It's Peanut Butter and Jelly Time
by ludwigsgirl97
Summary: Humanstuck: Tavros is bullied in school, when a stranger wearing clown make-up stands up for him. This soon becomes friendship, and then love, but Gamzee holds a secret. He's fresh out of the mental hospital nearby for violent schizophrenia. Long version of the oneshot of mine by nearly the same title.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N- so this is the story by the (almost) same title, only this is the extended version, rather than the one shot. I'll probably delete the original after I finish this, unless people ask me not to. Thanks for reading, and hope you enjoy!**

Gamzee Makara was a bit of an oddball. He liked to wear face paint, which made him look like a clown, and was a bit unsettled if he didn't have the familiar weight on his skin. He drank Faygo, though was saddened by the dwindling number of readily available flavors the local stores carried. He had just moved into a small town, and was a bit of a loaner. Not by choice, either; but simply because he'd yet to be introduced to anyone, and they tended to stay away from weirdoes in clown make-up. And so instead he went to the abandoned meadow and simply stared at the sky, watching the clouds rolled by as he lay on his back trying to focus on the future, and getting no where with it.

This is where he met arguably the most important person in his life: Tavros Nitram. The wind was blowing light summer breeze over the green, thick grass, when he heard the protesting voice of a young man. He sat up, and looked over to find three linebacker-sized boys rolling around in the wheelchair that obviously belonged to the boy they were currently tormenting. He was a boy small of stature, with a mohawk of dark brown hair, and pouting brown eyes. His skin looked Hispanic in tone, and he was lying with no legs on the floor, as the three jerks laughed and called him any name one could think of.

Gamzee hated people being mean to others, especially those who couldn't protect themselves. He only wanted to see people happy, it's why he wore the make-up, because clowns by definition made things cheery. He stood and walked toward the group.

Tavros Nitram was a bit of an outcast. He had never really had any friends, only his elder sister, Terezi, who had changed her last name to their mother's maiden of Pyrope after their father had walked out on them when she was eighteen, leaving her to raise him all alone since their mother had died in a car wreck. The same one that had left Tavros paralyzed from his mid-thighs down. His sister was blind, but claimed to smell colors, and seemed to be able to, considering she often made comments one would need the gift of vision to know about. She worked at the local mental hospital, in the trauma area. In fact, nearly everyone in this town did, since it had started up as a place for the doctors to live. The nut house had been what made this town more than an empty field.

This afternoon after school was out, before he could wheel himself home, he was interrupted by three boys: Tom, Chuck, and George, three boys who seemed to think that tormenting Tavros was the great American pastime, and did so at every opportunity. They had taken him to the empty field right outside of town, but outside enough that no one would be there, or hear anything done there, and kicked him out of his chair. They were rolling around in it, and likely messing up the very delicate adjustments made so that it fit him right, while he sat on the floor, trying to look as strong as a cripple could.

He heard the soft crunching of feet walking on fresh grass behind him, and turned to see something much scarier than the idiots in front of him: a tall, lanky boy with shaggy black hair, and pale skin. At least his arms were pale; he couldn't see his face through the heavy, Halloween style clown make-up covering it. Tavros was terrified of clowns. He had watched the movie "It" When he was a child, and it had wrecked his shit. Now there was a scary looking clown walking toward him, with a dazed expression. He nearly wet himself, until the boy leaned down and smiled at him. A smile full of care, without the least bit of malice.

"Are you all up and motherfuckin okay, bro?" He asked, tilting his head in question, his violet eyes like that of an infant. They were blank, but full of good intention.

"I suppose. They'll get tired of it eventually, so it's fine." Tavros said, smiling nervously.

"Are you sure? I'm pretty sure shit like that shouldn't be treated like that. And you probably wanna get home, motherfucker. I'll go get it for you. Just chill here, and slam a Faygo." Gamzee said, handing him the bottle he had brought with him, but never actually opened. Of course, Tavros had a stomach that was to sensitive for carbonated beverages, but he was more focused on the complete stranger sticking up for him. The complete stranger that he normally would have crossed the street to avoid crossing paths with, and told his sister about, to call the cops under any normal circumstances.

He started biting his fingernails in a nervous habit, resulting in him quickly running out of fingernail, and gnawing on his lip instead, working the red flesh between his teeth in a steady rhythm of anxiety.

"I really motherfuckin suggest you all up and give my bro his wicked wheelchair back." Gamzee said, his tone much darker than when he had spoken to Tavros.

"And are you gonna make us, you fuckin weirdo?" The largest boy asked, his short cropped blonde hair making him look more military-esk than his conduct showed.

"Actually, I motherfuckin am. I hate people who bully others, and I'm not gonna sit by and watch while you pick on a guy who can't walk, because you're too scared to fight anyone whose fully functional." Gamzee growled, cracking his neck to either side.

"You do realize there's three of us and one of you? Are you slow or something?" he asked.

"Yo, Tom; you think maybe this guy isn't the kind to fuck with? He looks like he's off his rocker, if you know what I'm sayin'" another boy, slightly smaller, but apparently owning the single brain cell they all shared. His brown hair was long, and held in a ponytail at the base of his neck.

Gamzee stood silently, as they turned to talk it out with each other. When Tom turned around, he simply grabbed the chair and wheeled it over to Tavros, helping into it before the others even noticed.

"Uhh… thanks, I guess. My name is Tavros." The cripple said, offering his hand and a nervous smile.

"Gamzee Makara. Nice to meet you, motherfucker." He took the hand, shaking it enthusiastically. Then heard the three boys walking up to him, and frowned at the fear in Tavros' eyes.

"I wasn't done with that, asshole." Tom said, and when Gamzee turned around, he saw the other boy with a knife.

"Please, don't! You can have the chair!" Tavros said, desperately, not wanting this kind stranger to get stabbed for him. His heart was beating fast, and his mind wasn't computing what was happening fast enough.

"No. They can't." Gamzee said, clenching his fists, and making knuckles crack as well.

"It's my chair!"

"But I just all up and got it back for you. It would be motherfuckin pointless to let them take it again." The tone was different than just a moment ago. It was darker. Not just angry, but homicidal. The kind of voice that one expected a serial killer to have; one that sent chills down your spine and the hair up your neck.

"So you wanna fight for the kid, when you just learned his name?" the pony-tail kid said, the other, an African American boy who seemed to want no part of it once the knife was pulled.

"That's your problem. You think that everything revolves around you. No one deserves to be treated like this. No one deserves to have everyone laugh at them, and hurt them because they can't get over the fact that they themselves are ignorant fucks. And that's why I'm gonna make sure none of you ever do it again. You've made me mad, motherfuckers." His smile was that of a mad man, and his eyes were void of intelligence, but wide open, shining with insanity. Tavros scooted himself away, scared all over again of the stranger named Gamzee.

"GAMZEE MAKARA!" A voice rang out, and Gamzee looked up. There was a short, but angry looking man in his late twenties walking toward the scene. " GET OUT OF HERE BEFORE I CALL THE COPS, AND CONSIDER YOURSELVES LUCKY."

"Who the hell are you?"

"The person who's going to call the police if you don't get out of here now." The adult said, his voice turning to a more normal tone now that he was up close. It was quite soothing when it wasn't shouting.

"K-Karkat? What are you doing here?" Gamzee snapped out of his momentary lapse in sanity as soon as the pale elder grabbed him roughly by the ear. Tavros flinched, wondering if they were brothers or something.

"We'll talk about this at home. Come on, kid, we'll make sure you get back alright." Karkat said, motioning for Tavros to follow him, before Gamzee finally escaped his grip and started pushing the chair. He was confused, but was frankly too scared of the both of them to ask questions.

"I'm sorry if I scared you, bro. I just got a little angry back there. I hate people like them." Gamzee said, and Tavros wanted to shout "A little?" but didn't do so.

"And trust me, he'll be getting it when he gets home. I've got the longest fucking lecture planned out for this one." Karkat said, walking in front of both of them, his arms crossed, and his eyes narrowed to the point where his ability to get around was almost as miraculous as Tavros' blind sister.

"Well, I'm sure he was just trying to scare them, so there wouldn't be a real confrontation. He was helping me, and I'd feel terrible if he got into trouble on my account." Tavros said, making himself as small as he could in his chair, leaning forward and craning his head down.

"Don't worry, Tavbro. Karkat's lectures aren't that bad." Gamzee assured him, a happy smile once again planted on his face.

They walked back to town with a chorus of Karat's yelling, Gamzee's laughing and Tavros' confusion. Tavros had no idea what was going on, only that he seemed to have made a new friend, who would be starting sophomore classes with him in a few days. He thought that Gamzee looked older than sixteen, and Karkat explained that he had fallen back in middle school, and had to repeat two grades; or rather, the same grade twice.

"What has you home so late, Tav? Did you finally get laid?" Terezi asked as the boy rolled into their small home.

"No, Sis. Just uhh… some guys messing with me. It's fine." He said, just wanting to go to his room and think. It was something he was in desperate need of.

"Then why do you smell like you're in love?" She asked, handing him a plate with his favorite food on it: a peanut butter and jelly sandwich.

"Because you can't actually smell something like that. But, uh, thanks for the food." He mumbled, placing the plate in his lap, and storming off to his room as best he could with his quiet demeanor and unmoving legs.

Terezi smiled with knowing. She most certainly could smell love. She had smelled it on herself once. Love and heartbreak were unfortunately familiar.

**A/N- so the next chapter is just going to be flashbacks, but very plot important ones, so I hope you continue reading and enjoy!**


	2. Chapter 2

_Gamzee Makara was seven years old. His mother was dead, having passed away in childbirth, and his father made a living as a party clown. This meant that Gamzee often got to go to the various parties that his father worked at, meeting plenty of new kids, and playing all sorts of games. However, he rarely did. Because then he'd have to be near the man with the face paint on who took him home each night. He hated going home, being alone with the monster with a smile painted on his face, who made every child happy but his own. To his very own son he gave only misery._

_Every night was a blurry nightmare of pain and fear. Every morning was not a hurried cover-up, making sure that his bruises, nor those on the outside could see his frown. Though his entire body ached constantly, he never told anyone of the horrific deeds that made this so. His father had ensured that he was more terrified of the outside world than staying in his torture chamber of a home._

_It was probably the abuse that triggered his biggest problem, birthing the enemy that hated him the most: the voices. Voices that came out of nowhere and told him constantly how worthless he was. That he deserved to die, or the scariest, that someone else did. Mostly his father; the voices hated the man in the clown mask. Wanted him dead more than anything else. _

_Until one night, Gamzee finally said no. The man was sliding his shirt off, when the voices came back, stronger than usual. _

"_Don't let him have you again. Kill him. He deserves it. Make him pay." They screamed, all of them coming from the same source: the beast that looked a hell of a lot like him, but larger, scarier, meaner._

"_I don't wanna." He whimpered, still feeling the nearly indestructible bond of a son and his father. _

"_Are you telling me no, boy?" His father asked, his belt coming undone with a hiss and a crack as the buckle knocked against itself._

"_No, sir. I wasn't talking to you." The boy said quickly, not wanting to feel the leather on his already scarred, small back. _

"_Then who the fuck were you talking to?" He growled, and Gamzee became terrified. He'd never told his father about the voices. Never wanted him to know that deep inside, he wanted him dead for what he did._

"_T-the monster sir. The one that talks in my head." Gamzee said, shaking from the cold of the un-heated room in winter, but more so from fear. _

"_A monster in your head, huh? I suppose we'll have to get it out of you." The man said, and the small boy cried out as the demented leather met his skin, flaying it and sending streams of blood sliding down. _

_Usually two or three was enough, but this time, he kept going. Gamzee's knees gave out at six, and so the last two fell on his neck. Then he stood up again, turning and landing a punch on the man's stomach._

"_I'm motherfuckin tired of you. I've got my understandin' on, and it tells me that you need to die now!" Gamzee said, his eyes going mad. But he was only seven years old, after all, and just like that, his rebellion was put to an end. The man bashed a lamp over his skull, and everything went black. _

_When he woke up, he was surrounded by black. He felt around and realized that he was in a dumpster, with his head throbbing and his back burning like it was on fire. He forced the lid off, and crawled out. He saw a road close by, and ran into it, figuring that he'd either be found and saved by some innocent bystander, or run over and killed. Either way, he'd win; he'd get away from his tormenter. _

_The previous outcome occurred, a young woman stopped and called the police, pulling him into a tight hug. He flinched at the pain on his back, and she looked horrified when her hands came away bloody. _

"_I'm sorry." He whispered, passing out once more in her arms, his paint-covered face going slack._

_He was placed in foster care after he got better. Mostly he simply being there and showing his bare face, naked as he felt without it, arrested his father on his testimony in court. There were three long scars, shallow but prominent on his young pale skin, where three belt strokes had fallen._

_Each new family treated him well, but passed him on in the end. The smile he kept painted on his face in grey-violet poorly concealed the fact that the flesh underneath it rarely mimicked the movement. Nine years passed, and Gamzee was in high school. He was making excellent grades, and the only thing he was failing was attendance. _

_The voices were getting louder, but he never told anyone. He'd simply stay home, saying that he had a fever, or a stomach bug. He would usually be left alone in his room, and he would sit there, sheets over his head, sobbing. He hated the things the voices told him to do. He hated himself, for creating the monster. More than once he had simply looked at the small pocketknife his first foster mother had given him for his birthday, and dragging it across a pale throat, giving he a smile that would finally be able to cheer someone up. But he could never gather up the courage. He had never been able to beat the beast, nor the part of him that knew every word from its mouth was wrong. _

_But every wave must crest, and that crest came during lunch in the spring of his sophomore year. He was wandering the campus after eating his food, when he found four boys and a girl. She had a hand over her mouth, and just about everywhere else on her curvy frame. Tears fell from her baby blue eyes to soak into her angel blonde hair. His rage built as flashbacks of two too-big hands combing his body zoomed through his head. _

"_Kill them. They deserve it. Just like that man did. You can do it now. I know you can." The voices said, more unified and booming than ever before. _

_ Gamzee didn't speak. Warning was a luxury undeserved by scum like this. He just cracked his knuckles, and his fist met the head of the first one, the one holding the majority of her waist. The men turned away from the terrified girl to her unlikely savior. Their friend was lying on the concrete, blood pooling from his head. They didn't have time to tend to him, however, or even see if he was alive or dead. Gamzee was soon swinging on them, and not even seeming to notice the blows he received in return. It wasn't long before the lanky teen was standing with six bodies around him, drenched in blood. He looked back at the girl, who hadn't dared go through the fray in front of her, in spite of the fact that it was her only exit._

"_honk" Gamzee said softly, looking at her with shining eyes. The eyes of someone who had just enjoyed himself or herself quite thoroughly. _

"_P-please doesn't hurt me." She stuttered, pushing her back against the wall of the cranny in the school building. _

"_HONK!" he shouted, moving a little closer. She was sobbing, and he took tiny steps closer. And then he simply stopped, before falling to the ground, body contorting in shocking spasms. She looked up to find a young blonde in aviator shades and a police uniform. His nametag said "Strider" and he pulled out handcuffs, restraining the boy, even as electricity coursed through his body. _

_While the boys didn't die, Gamzee was deemed to be too psychologically scarred to be in normal society, the reasons he was a danger being obvious. And yet, this was the one time where he was happy to have given in to the voices. He had saved that girl from the same pain he went through, and that was worth it. _

_At least that's what he told himself in brief moments of clarity. Most of the time, he lay, strapped to the hospital bed, leather digging into his wrists. He would be sedated for feeding and bathing, and left the rest of the time to shout to a heaven that had forgotten him. There was only one thing that made his time in the institution bearable, and that saving grace's name was Karkat Vantas. Karkat was a nurse in the severe unit of the mental hospital, and was known for being quite crabby, often lashing out at people for no apparent reason. _

_This is why he had been put in the unit where his patients would want to kill him no matter what. The people that were never expected to get better. The ones that were sent to asylum, solely so that the rest of the world wouldn't have to deal with him. But being Karkat, and never accepting failure, or inevitability, he still tried. And the patient he tried the hardest to make well was Gamzee. Every day, before he would be sedated, Karkat would talk to him. Even if Gamzee only yelled or threatened him back, it was what the Asian nurse had always done to everyone else. So he'd keep his relatively small frame straight, and look his grey eyes right into violet, and have a one sided conversation, just like he'd had to endure as a child from his brother, Kankri. _

_It was two years, however, and Gamzee showed no signs of improvement. At least to science. But Karkat could see subtle differences, and planned to exploit them. He knew that Gamzee had become less violent. He could hear it in the fact that he didn't threaten him, anymore, simply stood staring, and frowning until the drug hit him, and he was out like a light. So the nurse came up with an idea. _

"_You're crazy. We are not allowing a dangerous young man like this to leave the facility so that he can harm more people." The doctor said, and Karkat frowned._

"_You've never even medicated him to see if it would make him normal! But I'm willing to prove that he can be made passive. That I can make him okay again, even without the meds." Karkat claimed, and the doctor was quite interested. They soon struck a deal. If Karkat would lock himself in a room with Gamzee for an hour, without any restraints or medication, and the boy showed no signs of aggression, he would be medicated, and let out of the hell they called a hospital. _

_And so it came to be, that Gamzee was alone in a room with the tiny nurse. He tackled him as soon as he was un-strapped, but was shocked to find that instead of running away, the nurse simply wrapped him in an uncharacteristic hug, making soft, reassuring sounds as he patted his head softly. The voices, which had been drowning out all else for the past two years, finally just stopped, dying off like an old battery. _

"_What happened?" Gamzee asked, finally regaining himself. He was able to react the way he wanted again, and it felt great. _

"_You just got a little out of your head, Gamzee. You'll be fine." Karkat said, still encircling the boy in a hug._

"_W-who is you? How long has it been?" He asked, looking at himself and realizing he was even skinnier than before, and taller. Not to mention his hair had grown from well kept and barely touching his ears, to halfway down his back. _

"_I'm Karkat. I've been taking care of you. As well as can be expected when you tried to kill me every time I let you go." Karkat said, letting him go._

"_I'm motherfuckin sorry. It's not me it's-"_

"_The monster, the beast, the voices. I know. And it's okay, because you'll be coming home with me tonight." Karkat said, grinning triumphantly at the glass wall, where a number of people from the hospital had gathered._

"_So, you're my new foster parent?" Gamzee asked. Another home full of falsified love._

"_No, you dumb fuck, I'm adopting you. Permanently. Or at least until you turn eighteen in two weeks."_

"_Really?"_

"_Why the fuck would I lie, fuckass?" Karkat yelled, and Gamzee smiled, a genuine smile._

"_Motherfuckin miracles." Gamzee said, wrapping Karkat in a hug of his own, the smaller man's eastern complexion turning red at the emotional display._

**A/N- this isn't the only flashback necessary, but the other can wait, I suppose, lest this be outrageously un-proportional in length to the other chapters. I hope you enjoyed, and will continue to do so!**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N- Fun fact: Schizophrenia is actually caused by too much serotonin, which is basically the thing that makes you happy. So schizo people are essentially too happy, and drugs that bring you down stop your brain from getting it, and so without thinking, Hussie made Gamzee a grade an example of a self-medicating Schizophrenic. Which is why I analyzed him as such for my AP psych project. Anyway, here's chapter 3!**

School started that year, and Tavros was rushing to class as usual, so that no one had time to pick on him, when he heard footsteps behind him. He looked back, expecting any given member of the football team, but instead found that it was the violet-eyed clown boy. He raised his brow in question, wondering what the boy wanted.

"Yo, Tavbro!" He called, jogging up to the boy in the wheelchair.

Tavros looked up at him, and Gamzee caught his breath for a moment, before pulling a piece of paper from his pocket. The pocket of purple spotted black jeans, something Tavros had never seen before. He wondered where the other boy had gotten them.

"I need help finding my classes, bro. This school is all up and motherfuckin confusing. The 300 hall turns into 500 half-way through, and shit like that." He said, and Tavros flinched at each curse. Not only did he not like foul language, but also the teachers defiantly didn't, and they were always walking around looking for an innocent victim.

"That's because it's new, and there was already a 400 hall. And I thought you were older than me. You're just a sophomore?"

"Uh… I fell behind. School wasn't really my focus for a couple years." He said, vague and more reserved than usual. Tavros noticed that his eyes were sort of glazed, and he wondered if his new friend did drugs.

"Oh. Anyway, we have a lot of the same classes together, so just follow me, I guess." Tavros said, and Gamzee smiled.

"Thanks, Tav. On to math class!" Gamzee said, getting behind the chair and pushing it. People looked at them strangely, partially because Gamzee still had clown make-up on, and partially because Gamzee was pushing him, when no one else had ever done so before. He was new, and it wouldn't be long before rumors of the two of them being together would circulate the school.

…

Surprisingly, Gamzee was fairly good at math. He answered every question, while everyone else simply sat there confused. Multiplying matrices was something very few got as quickly as he, and the teacher didn't seem happy about him being one of them. He was strange in a small town where everything had to meet the status quo. He was different, and if Tavros knew anything about people, it was that they didn't like different.

Two minutes before the bell rang, the teacher said that he had nothing left to do. Gamzee was seated next to Tavros, seeing as how no one else wanted to be within six feet of either outcast. Tavros was at a small table, so that he could just push his chair up to it, and Gamzee had scooted a desk over to sit next to him.

"How do you get this? It's so hard!" Tavros complained, and Gamzee's half-lidded eyes just smiled at him.

"You aren't good at multi-tasking, are you, Tav?"

"I don't know. But still, it's hard." The cripple's lip pouted, and Gamzee's breath caught in his throat, causing him to cough a few times.

"Anyway, I could help you with it, if you want. You could come by my place, or I could come by yours." The clown offered.

"I suppose. You seem to be able to do it better than the teacher." The quiet boy laughed a little, and it was like music to Gamzee's ears. Just the sound made him smile a little wider.

"I'm not that good. Anyway, who's house do you wanna do it at? Or maybe a library?"

"Oh, um… The library works." Tavros said, not really wanting his sister to scare off his only friend with her creepy smell-talk. He also didn't want to be alone with him just yet. Not because he particularly distrusted him, simply that he didn't know him all that well.

"Ok. We'll go after school. I'll make up some problems before then." Gamzee said, as the bell rang. They didn't share the next class, but Gamzee wheeled Tavros to his nonetheless, and showed up late to his second period. Tavros blushed the entire time he was being moved around by his friend.

….

Gamzee finished the day with no problems, something he couldn't wait to report to his caretaker. The voices hadn't so much as sneezed for the entire day. He hadn't even had to take one of the pills that he kept with him at all times. They were kind of like an emergency inhaler for the insane. He took one, and he calmed down within fifteen minutes, so the doctor said. Of course, the left him pretty much half-asleep for the next eight hours. He figured that was better than killing someone and ending up in the hospital again, though. His normal medicine seemed to be working well enough.

At the local library, a small thing with only a few hundred books and an encyclopedia, Tavros and Gamzee sat down for the strange tutoring. People would likely have assumed Gamzee dumb due to his strange appearance, but the fact was he was quite the intelligent boy. Just with serious issues.

"Okay, so you multiply these numbers, and then add them with the product of these numbers?" Tavros asked, starting to get the hang of it after seven problems.

"Yep. See, I knew you could all up and get it." Gamzee said, ruffling his hair, not even thinking about it. It had been what Karkat did to him when he was in the hospital, and he didn't consciously remember it, but his body knew it was reassuring. What he did notice was the fact that as his hand was raised, Tavros flinched away, as if expecting to be hit. The smile fell from Gamzee's face, and he excused himself, saying that he needed to go to the bathroom.

Tavros wondered what he had done wrong. There had been a big smile, and his clown friend had been so happy. Was his hair greasy, and he went to wash his hands? He ran his hands through the dark chocolate mohawk, and found it to be a little dry if anything.

Gamzee's reaction, however, had nothing to do with anything that Tavros had done wrong. When he had flinched, Gamzee realized that he was used to being hit, and the voices started up again. Once in the bathroom, he locked the door, and took the small bottle from his pocket, dry swallowing one. He read the label, and took two more, though the voices only seemed to get louder. Tears started in his eyes, as they got so loud it was giving him a headache. He looked at himself in the mirror, fingers gripping the porcelain of the sink so hard his hands were white, rather than their normal pale pink.

Behind him was the monster that had haunted him for a decade. Like a mix of himself and a lion, with a victorious smirk on his face.

"Go away." Gamzee growled at it, teeth clenched.

"Come on, Gamzee. Don't you want to make the people who hurt him pay?" The voices said, uniting into one.

"Yes, but not the way you like to play ball. I can't take back what's been done. Only be with him so it doesn't happen again."

"But you can't always be with him. What if they find him while you're gone?"

"I can't do anything about that."

"You can kill them, Gamzee."

"They'd send me back to the hospital."

"So you're that selfish?"

"I can't protect him from there."

"He won't need it if you kill them all."

"I can't, and I won't. Just go away."

"You'll warm up to the idea soon enough." The voices started getting softer as the medicine started working. Gamzee felt himself become heavier, and he was stumbling as he walked out of the bathroom.

Tavros looked up as his friend came out, looking a lot more sluggish than usual. He wondered if the boy had just smoked something in there. It made sense.

"Hey, that took a while, are you okay?" Tavros asked, wondering what the cover-up would be.

"I'm fine. Whatever was for lunch isn't agreeing with me. We should get home. Come on, I'll carry your stuff." Gamzee said, packing up the books into Tavros' brown back-pack, and placing it on the back of the wheel chair before wheeling him down the ramp and heading toward their homes.

…

"Hey, Gamzee! Where the fuck are you?" Karkat yelled through the house, and Gamzee walked down the stairs, his eyes barely open, and stumbling like a drunk.

"I'm right here, motherfucker." The young man replied.

"So you had to take one of the pills?" the nurse asked, sighing. He had hoped the kid would last at least one day.

"Three. One didn't work." He said, sitting on the black leather couch, sinking in to the thick cushions.

"What! You could have overdosed you dumb fuck!" Karkat yelled, scowling.

"But if not, I might have hurt Tav. It was just the two of us when it happened." Gamzee said, as if that much should have been obvious.

"Tell me what happened." Karkat said, sitting in his recliner. Gamzee told him about how even the voices seemed to be really protective of the small boy. The nurse said that this made sense, considering the voices were essentially a more violent version of him. They carried his desires, without his morals.

"So what am I supposed to do?" Gamzee asked. Since he had met him, Karkat had always had the answers, or at least an answer. He trusted the Asian nurse with his life and sanity.

"Just take the pills, and try to avoid any situation in which either you or Tavros could be in danger. That means coming straight home. Any extra studying will be done at one of your houses, preferably his. That way you don't have to worry about him going home from here. You can use the car on Fridays, when I'm off." Karkat said, ruffling his messy black hair.

In spite of the fact that he was a grown man, Gamzee acted a lot like a child. He got up from the couch to place his head on Karkat's lap and fall asleep. Karkat sighed, and rubbed his head to keep him from having nightmares, as was common with the poor boy.


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N- Remember that other flashback? Yeah. Here it is. **

_Terezi Pyrope, Nitram at the time, was in love. She could literally smell a difference in herself. She had always had a keen sense of smell._

_His name was Dave Strider, a cool kid from Houston, and as such had a sexy Texan drawl that made him irresistible in her opinion. No, not her humble opinion, for she was, and is, far from humble. She knows that she is great, and will not hesitate to let you know it. _

_She was seventeen, and had very little experience with boys, other than her father, and the little brat she called a brother. He always stayed in his room, playing with his stupid Internet friends on some Japanese game where you raised weird animal things and made them fight each other. It was like a virtual cock fight from what she could understand, and while her strong sense of morality found something wrong with it, their parents found it harmless, so their wasn't much she could do._

_He had walked in at the start of the spring semester, wearing a white shirt, with red long sleeves, and a record on the front. His eyes were hid by shades, and his hair, as well as his skin, was a stark white. She smiled when she saw him, finding him instantly cuter than any of the other boys in the entirety of your town. She wondered if there was a movie shoot she didn't know about for some school movie, because she had never seen him, and he looked like an actor. She blushed a little as she walked by him, but stayed calm. She is strong, and determined that she will be the greatest fucking prosecutor in the world one day, and she refused to let that track be taken off course by some cool guy._

_That is until he said "Hey." And she realized with a beet red face that he had just addressed her, and was lifting an eyebrow from underneath the protective covering of his shades. She smiled awkwardly, and looked at him, voice unable to express the fact that he had her attention._

"_Do you know where I can find room fucking 301? If I'm late because of how this school is set up, I'm gonna do a pirouette off the handle, man." He said, and she noticed his accent, instantly falling in love with it. Unfortunately, so did the group of cheerleaders to her front, who proceeded to squeal like morons, and start whispering among themselves. Not that it couldn't be heard, because every "Who's he" and "He's SOOOO hot" Were perfectly audible to everyone, and likely this was his or her intention. _

"_It's down this hall. I'll show it to you. Stupid fucking whores." She said, always having been an opinionated person, and never on to hold her tongue._

_When they were out of earshot, she was shocked when he said: _

"_They really are whores, aren't they? Just because I have a fucking accent, you'd think I was some kind of European model. Thank God you aren't one of them." He said, and her heart soared, happier than she had ever remembered being. As he walked into his first period, carrying a notebook and a cocky grin, she swooned, and noticed a strange smell had covered her body. Like a mix of freshly cut grass, and really fragrant roses. She was sure that no one else would be able to smell it, she barely could, but she still had no clue what it was, and this in and of it made her a bit on-edge. She had long since learned every emotion's smell, and every natural smell that happened in this rickety piece of shit town birthed and kept alive by the insane, both in and out of the hospital._

Fast forward: three weeks

_She had been hanging out with the cool kid, mostly texting him, and talking to him at school. And then there was the enormous fuss over whom he would ask to the Winter Ball. Knowing that he had come in late, the aforementioned sluts had dumped their boyfriends in the hope that they would be his chosen ladies. It was in two weeks, and he had yet to so much as give an inkling of whom he would be escorting, or even if he would be present. Terezi was the only girl he even talked to, aside from teachers, and those he was put into project groups with, and everyone was certain that he would never pick the loud, obnoxious, barely-a-female lawyer-smartass that was Terezi Nitram. _

_And yet the days went by, and Terezi almost had the hope that he would ask her, when he asked her if she was going. She had answered in the affirmative, thinking that perhaps this was his prelude. He simply nodded; saying that it was cool, and that it would suck to go alone, and he wouldn't bother if she wasn't going to be there to hang out with._

_But now Terezi had no choice but to show, since she had since given him the okay. She had no choice but to talk this out with her best friend, Aradia Megido. _

"_Let me guess, you've gone and fallen for Dave like the rest of the female population?" She said, her voice a soothing near monotone. She was sitting with her boyfriend, Sollux Captor, the guy voted most likely to run a software company. He could do anything with a computer, and had even hacked into Vriska's various online accounts, and gave away al of her money as a birthday gift to Terezi. Not that his girlfriend hadn't appreciated it. Everyone who didn't wear short skirts and speak in obnoxiously perky rhymes hated Vriska. They were quite sure even Vriska hated Vriska, and simply hated herself too much to admit she was right in hating herself. _

"_Yeah. And he hangs out with me, and he even asked me if I was going to the ball."_

"_You told him yes?" Aradia asked, and Terezi nodded. "And did he ask you?" She shook her head._

"_He'th doing one of two thing'th. He'th going to a'thk you there, or you really are just another bro to him. Hard to tell at this point. Just go and see if he a'thks you to dan'the." The man said, his lisp showing as always. _

"_And what do I do if he doesn't ask me? We've only known each other for a month." _

"_Then you continue being friends, and learn to accept that that's all you could end up. You can't hold out for something that you won't get, Terezi" Aradia said, smiling softly at her friend._

"_Easy for you to say. You have a man." The lawyer mumbled, stuffing her lunch into her face, hoping that the food would make her feel a little better. _

The Winter Ball:

"_Okay, your hair is done, Aradia. Now do mine. Nothing too frilly minds you, just maybe straightening it, or waving it a little." Terezi said, as they got ready for the ball together. Sollux would be picking both of them up, and hopefully she would be leaving with Strider. She was wearing a red dress with a teal sash. It hung loose around her flat-clad feet, satin slippers looking sufficiently dainty, while at the same time allowing her to walk home if she had to, as well as dance without killing her untrained feet. _

_Aradia was wearing nearly the opposite. She was wearing Prussian blue, with a red, small bow tied loosely at her ample hips. Her hair fell in soft curls around her petite body, making her the peak of beauty. Everyone had been shocked when, not only had she agreed to date Sollux, but had even asked him out, and begged him to give her a chance. He had of course accepted, and pissed off all of the kids in the popular clique. Not that they really cared. She had half-inch heels that matched her sash. Neither of them was wearing much make-up, and by not much, Terezi's case was none at all. She already felt like the Barbie dolls she had never really liked as a child, and being further dressed up would simply make her turn into plastic, and stare dumbly into space. Like the majority of the girls at her school. _

_Terezi's hair was fairly straight as it was, but it had a slight up-turn at the ends, and tended to stick up in odd places like she was some kind of anime character. Aradia smoothed it out, and told her she at least had to put on a little lip-gloss. Apple flavor, Strider's favorite. At least he really loved apple juice. _

_When Sollux pulled up, he was wearing a black suit, with a red shirt, and a blue tie, as well as a blue pocket hankie. They matched perfectly, and Terezi realized that she and Dave had not so much as mentioned doing something like this. Then again, why would they? It wasn't a date, or at least it didn't start as one. _

_The third wheel dutifully took the backseat of his Honda, while they forgot she existed in their lovey-dovey world of no one else. She was vaguely jealous of them, being so happy together. Happier than anyone she had ever seen._

_They arrived quickly, and Terezi got out as Sollux, ever the gentleman, opened the door for his love, and helped her out. The dateless went in as they took a moment to mumble what the two of them, could only interpret, and scanned the crowd in the gym for her friend-date. _

_She found him leaning against a wall, a cool kid's natural habitat, still wearing the shades, but not the rest of his usual attire. He had on a red suit that appeared to be made of the plushest felt, with a black shirt and white tie. He had no breast pocket, and so he went hankie-less. She approached him, and mentally punched the air as his eyes widened, his jaw dropping slightly in a flabbergasted grin._

"_Damn, you look good." He said, and she blushed darker._

"_Lookin' pretty snazzy yourself, cool kid." She said softly, her normal voice being much more soothing than her more used high-pitched caw. _

"_And your fucking voice too? Man you are Terezi, right? I mean Jegus, shouldn't you be in an executioner's outfit?" He joked, moving to put his weight on his own two legs._

"_Yes, it is the Terezi." She said, laughing a little._

"_Well, in that case, can I get you some punch, my lady?" He bowed slightly, a cocky grin on his face._

"_Fine. But if it's spiked, I'm blaming you." She said, and he went off to grab them both a glass, or rather, plastic cup. _

_She watched him leave, smiling all the while. She may not have been one of the cheerleading whores, but she was human, and he had quite the ass. But it wasn't only his looks. She had taken the time to know him, and had found that she liked what she saw. He had the morals one would expect from a western gentleman, and he regarded women with the grace a man should. He had even confessed to her that, in spite of the fact that woman literally threw himself at him; he was still a virgin, having taken to none of them. He came back, and handed her the fruity drink, giving a small toast with the cheap plastic._

"_So I hear you're here solo?" He asked, raising an eyebrow, and she blushed slightly before nodding._

"_I didn't get asked by anyone. Don't really know anyone but you, and Aradia and Sollux of course, but they're attached at the hip."_

"_So then would it be okay if you dance with me?" He asked, extending his hand to her as a slow song started to drizzle from the previously booming speakers. She wondered if her had set this up, or if it was simply coincidence. Knowing Strider, likely the former. _

"_I suppose I could deign to dance with the most wanted man in the county." She joked, taking the hand, and setting the newly acquired drink on the table, not really caring about it anymore. _

_As he locked his right hand in her left, he placed his other loosely around her hip, and she his shoulder. They were barely touching other than that, the swell of her relatively ample breasts brushing his chest every now and then as they swayed in small circles. She was shocked when he took the hand that was on her hip, and used it to removed his shades, revealing blood red eyes. _

"_Your eyes…" She said, surprised and staring._

"_I wear the shades because I have to. It's why I never get in trouble. I'm an albino. I'll go blind if I don't." He confessed, now unhindered eyes staring into hers with unfiltered intensity. _

"_Could the strobe lights hurt them?"_

"_Doesn't matter. I'll be a happy man if I get to go blind seeing you." He said, his sarcastic smirk nowhere to be found, replaced by a small, serious frown. Her heart beat like a snare drum in her chest, and she thought she was going to pass out._

"_Strider I-"She started, and he placed a finger to her mouth, before pulling her closer._

"_Please. Call me Dave." He whispered, burying his head in her shoulder, though the angle he had to bend his neck to do so must have been uncomfortable._

"_Dave… What are you trying to say? Be plain with me."_

"_But you're anything but plain. I'll feel inferior." He said, lifting his head so that it was only inches away from hers._

"_Dammit Dave!" _

"_Fine. But you can't be mad at me."_

"_I won't be." She promised, and he touched his forehead to hers, taking a deep breath._

"_I've fallen in love with you, Terezi Nitram." He said softly, breath gliding across her skin. In a fit of boldness, she tilted her head so that their lips were touching rather than their foreheads. _

_As was his custom, Strider didn't miss a beat, pulling her flush against him and responding with more passion than she could have imagined. She put a hand on his face, only to find a tear falling down his cheek. _

"_What's wrong?" She asked, pulling away, only to find that he was smiling from ear to ear, and holding her against him by the hips._

"_Nothing. Everything is perfect." He said, and she looked confused. "They're tears of joy, Terezi." _

"_This is a dream, isn't it?" She asked, resting her head on his chest, the memory of his kiss still lingering on her lips._

"_Maybe. But I hope I'll never wake up." He said, holding her closer as the song ended._

_And that kiss, and all the ones that had come after it had still lingered. Even as she heard the worst news she could possibly hear. Dave had hydroplaned into her parents trying to come wish her happy birthday. It had killed him, and her parents. And her baby brother would never be able to walk again. She was nineteen. He was ten. And both their lives seemed to be over._

**A/N- please don't kill me for going Hussie and killing Dave. I hope that you liked this chapter, as well as those before it. Thanks for reading!**


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N- this is back to the present. And I know I didn't put it in the description, but there will be Karezi. Sorry to anyone who doesn't like it, but it is going to be the secondary couple, so I hope you don't mind too much. Oh, and Terezi wasn't born blind, I'll explain what happened in this chapter. Sorry for any confusion.**

"I'm going to work, Gamzee. Try not to do anything fucking stupid while I'm there." Karkat called through the house, as he did every morning.

"All right, see you this motherfuckin afternoon!" Gamzee called back, in a seemingly good mood.

Karkat got into his car, and started the engine, hating the fact that it was fucking January, and the windows had frost on them. He got up and grabbed the scraper, wishing he had money for a house with a garage. He probably would have, if it weren't for the fact that he was also taking care of a kid. Not even a kid, but a grown man, simply acting like a kid. He was constantly having to but Gamzee new clothing after he wore his out, and he had to order them since the little weirdo would only wear those freaking pajamas. He spent his monthly rent of Band-Aids since the moron thought that he could fly, or ride a fucking unicycle, or whatever dumb shit had gotten into his head this time. He had to pay for twice the gas that most people did, since his old piece of shit got about an inch to the fucking gallon, and he himself had a thing for cashmere sweaters. Yes, scraping the windows would be a necessity until he could get that online medical degree he was after. Then he could actually help out the people, without having to adopt them.

The drive to the hospital was long and boring, and the radio had long since broken, leaving Karkat to his thoughts. He wondered if Gamzee would be all right, as he usually did. The boy seemed to be getting worse, and all because he went and fell in love. The fact that this is what occurred was quite obvious, since usually the clown didn't care about anything. He just stayed calm no matter the situation. But now he was ready to rip heads off at the slightest provocation by Tavros.

And then there was his sister. Karkat had recognized Terezi, as she was the eccentric of the hospital, a nurse working in the ER portion. Then again, after his stunt with Gamzee, he was giving her a run for her money as the local crazy, at least if they only counted those who weren't patients.

And yet he had only ever seen her through the eyes of a colleague. He had never stopped to realized that she had apparently lived through far too much trauma for him to have ever recovered from, and yet was one of the cheeriest people that Karkat had ever met, if not the absolute cheeriest. She always had a laugh, even though she knew that everyone was simply laughing at her. The angry, belligerent man that was Karkat Vantas was feeling a strange alteration in the way his heart beat every time he thought about her, and it was feeling suspiciously like the emotion that humans liked to call love. He sighed as he reached the looming building, and parked, getting ready for another day of work.

Terezi was sitting by herself at lunch as usual, eating the same tuna sandwich she always ate, when she heard footsteps approaching her. She smelled the pale skin and black hair that clued her in to this being Gamzee's caretaker.

"Hey, can I sit here?" He asked, and she nodded.

"What is it that you need, my future brother-in-law?"

"Partially to see if you were really shitting about the smell thing. Since you can tell that I'm not old, or even that I'm actually me, then I really believe you now. And partially because sitting alone is really starting to fucking suck ass." He said, and she smiled slightly.

"Thanks for that I guess. And I've never minded much. It gives me time to think."

"Thinking, huh? Seems depressing to me. I'd rather be doing."

"I can respect that."

"You don't seem to talk much."

"What would you like me to say?"

"I don't know. You could fucking talk about yourself, or say something. I heard that you were a spit fire, but your more like a fucking electric blanket right now,"

"So you _want_ me to go off on you? Fine. Your hair looks like you haven't combed it in a week, you wear that same sweater everyday, and probably the same pants, that doesn't look like the cancer sign, it looks like a 69, and I'm surprised you've not been fired for either being out of uniform or sexual harassment. And you also have a really bad overbite."

"So you pay attention to what I wear, huh?" Karkat grinned, and Terezi blushed.

"When you're the only one not wearing light blue scrubs it's hard not to. You're like the annoying emo kid that everyone makes fun of, except no one tells you because we think it'll make you kill yourself."

"And the bright red glasses don't make you stand out? Or the fact that you wear red scrubs while everyone else wears their boring monotones?"

"You don't like the color red?"

"No, it's my favorite actually. But that's beside the point."

"You haven't asked me how I know what color your shirt is." She pointed out, and he scoffed.

"I already said I believe you! I've seen guys do weirder shit." He said, stuffing his burger in his mouth.

"You're the first. Including my own brother."

"So Tavros is your little brother, then?"

"Yeah. And we all know how you came to be taking care of Gamzee. How is he by the way?"

"Don't tell anyone, but the idiot went and fell in love. The voices act up anytime someone thinks about threatening your kid." Karkat said, rolling his stormy eyes. He jumped slightly as his phone buzzed in his pocket. No one ever texted him.

For a moment he thought it was Gamzee, and was prepared to rush back to the town, when he saw his older brother's name flash across the screen.

_I will be arriving in town for a visit sometime tomorrow afternoon. I would have called, but you are likely at work right now, and I would not want to anger you in any way by interrupting you with a call. Please inform me if this is in any way inconv-_

It went on to another page

_Enient, as I would not want to burden you with my presence should you find it so. Please call me when it is most convenient for you, so that we can work out the details of the stay. Have a nice day, little brother._

Karkat wanted to punch himself. Of all the fucking people to show up, why did it have to be his older brother? Karkat was going to go crazy before Gamzee was. It was bad enough sharing a room with the guy, especially after he got onto the high school debate team, and started winning speaking awards. Then he thought people gave a fuck about what he said. Of course, he was now the governor, so apparently someone thought he was semi-competent, but that was only because they hadn't seen him as a kid. Either way, the asshole was paying for Karkat's college, so he should probably at least let him come over.

_I'll make the spare room ready. And by that I mean one of us is getting the couch, unless you want to fucking fight Gamzee for it. I'll talk to you later today._

As much as Karkat pretended that he hated his brother, he smiled a little at the text. Kankri was always considerate of everyone but himself, and he was perfectly aware that the politician, used to sleeping in his own king size bed, wouldn't let him sleep on the couch. Even if the thing was just as comfortable as the damn bed. He would wait to be served last, and say that he wasn't hungry; to ensure that everyone else got his or her fill before dinner ran out. At Christmas, Kankri would only ask for things that he could make into gifts for others, and on Halloween, no matter how much his friends protested, Karkat would always be coming with them to whatever party they were headed to. If Karkat couldn't go, then he wasn't going either. He was a genius in everything he did, even if he was a bit of a smartass. Karkat wouldn't have traded his brother for anything, even if he did come with a Tylenol bill.

"Who are you texting, Karkles? Your girlfriend?"

"You know damn well I don't have a girlfriend. That would require fucking leaving that dumbass Gamzee in the house for longer than is absolutely necessary. Shit gets disastrous after a while."

"You love the kid."

"Shut up. Anyway, it was my fucking older brother."

"You have an older brother?"

"Yeah. The fucking Governor, too. Asshat just had to one-up me, and then pay for my fucking college so any accomplishments I make in the future will still be his."

"So don't take the money."

"Shut up! I don't have the kind of cash to do it by myself."

"So he's doing you a favor. You need to get laid."

"Unless that was an offer, shut up."

"Maybe it was, but I'll at least get a movie out of you first."

"Shut the fuck up, whore."

"Anyway, I'm sure that a big strong man like you can handle his older brother for a little while. He can't be crazier than the kid you already have hanging out with you."

"Yeah, but Gamzee takes his pill, and he's fine. There's no medical cure for being an asshat, and his giant mouth is his only occupation."

Terezi laughed as Karkat got up, stuffing the rest of his food in his mouth, no doubt realizing that it was almost time to get back to work and he had to walk all the way back to the psych building. They kept it a safe distance away, to prevent the crazies and the cancer patients getting mixed up.

And yet as he left, her mind picked the most inopportune moment to have a flashback. Constantly blood-shot eyes widened, as she was no longer in the cafeteria.

_Summer wind blew past her face as she rushed to the scene of the accident. She had asked her little brother when he called her on their parents' cell phone, what was wrong. _

"_Mom and Dad won't wake up. Please, I don't know what to do. My legs." He had whimpered, and tears welled in her eyes._

"_Are your legs okay? How much do they hurt?"_

"_That's the thing. They don't. They feel…invisible." He said, and she told him she'd be there in a minute hanging up and sprinting as fast as she could. _

_What she found there was the worst possible situation. Not only were her parents staring an unmoving, and glassy eyed, but the person who had crashed into them had been Dave, coming to wish her a happy eighteenth birthday. She saw her little brother, clutching their mother's lifeless body, as it chilled, and the blood around them congealed. She saw Dave, his glasses flung to the side, and his red eyes nearly completely white, as well as his skin, the blood that had colored them covering his car. They had hit hard enough that it was instant, neither set of airbags deploying. Tavros had been flung forward so hard that, while it likely saved his life, the seatbelt had cracked his spine like a twig. _

"_Oh God, why?" She asked, picking the broken boy up and clutching him to her chest. _

"_Mom wasn't paying attention, and then Dave didn't stop. I think it was the water. They were both going so fast. I'm scared, sis." Tavros said, but Terezi had no words for him. Her vision had gone black, and her hearing was like she was underwater. She simply smelled. The iron tinge in the air, the scent of blood, and her mind decided, as it chose never to see again, if only so that this color wouldn't have to be processed. _

"_It's okay, sis. You don't have to cry. I'm sure it'll work out okay." He promised her, and she clutched him closer, not believing that she was such a failure as a big sister that her little brother was comforting _her_ as he lost his lower half. _

"_Yeah. I'm sure it will." She lied, wiping the tears away._


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N- and back to the actual couple. I forgot for a second that everyone came for PBJ, not KarkatxTerezi. Hehe… sorry. Here it is!**

"_Sollux, are you sure about this?" Aradia asked, as they walked into the old barn. Yes, it was Vriska who had told them about the building, but then it couldn't be that bad. Even she could have been simply trying to help them out, and what was the worst that could happen after all?_

"_You and Vriska are friend'th, 'thort of, 'tho 'th'he was ju'tht trying to help u'th out." He said, his lisps as bad as ever, if not worse due to the fact that he had stopped trying to hide it in front of Aradia. _

"_I know. But not only here, but the fact itself." She said, referring to the fact that they had come here specifically to have sex, where neither of their families could find them. _

_He simply smiled, and placed a small kiss on her nose. She smiled back at him, returning it to his lips. The kiss deepened, and her hands gripped his shirt as she opened her mouth, inviting him inside. His tongue slipped with ease into the warm cave awaiting it. He was placing his hand underneath her shirt, when the door burst open. Waiting was Vriska, as if the couple hadn't seen that coming._

"_Well, well, if it isn't the two little love birds. Too bad that you aren't anywhere the same kind of bird. No where genetically similar." She said, and Aradia rolled her eyes._

"_What are you up to now, Vriska?" She demanded, taking a step forward. _

"_You turned down my little brother, and he had to settle for that barely above average slut Nepeta. But with you out of the picture, you'll never be compared to her again, and he can have the social status he should." She said, and two sets of eyes went wide as she pulled out a lighter, flicking it open as a flame appeared. _

"_What the hell do you think you're doing?" Sollux shouted, but blue covered lips seemed to care little about his protests._

"_You know, barn fires are especially common in the country like this, and there's so much lighting outside. You sought comfort in each other and the barn, trying to love each other through the storm, but alas, God himself brought you up to meet him. It was very sad, and I'll probably cry at the funeral, no doubt attended by the entire town." She said, throwing it into the hay and rushing out. The two lovers ran after her, but found it locked when they tried to escape. They pounded on the door, begging and pleading._

"_I'm 'tho 'thorry, Aradia. If we get out of thi'th, I 'thwear I'll kill that bit'th." He growled, slamming into the door. But it was made to hold in creatures much larger than he._

"_It's okay, Sollux. I love you, so just sit down, and spend the last bit of time we have left with me. I can't imagine a better way to go." She said, sitting and leaning on the door._

"_A…Aradia…?" His eyes went wide, and then closed, as he resigned himself just as she had. He sat next to her, and she set her head on his shoulder, tears falling from her eyes, while a smile sat on her face. _

"_I love you, Sollux." She whispered, "Good night." _

"_I love you too. Night." He kissed her forehead, both of them trying to fall asleep before the fire killed them, not realizing that this would likely be the thing that got their murderer off._

"Gamzee, you made an A on the test, and you weren't even there for any of the lessons!" Tavros whined, looking at his low B.

"I just all up and knew the answers, Tav. I suppose I could stop knowing them, and mark them wrong, if that would make you feel better, bro." He said, looking up as if he was truly pondering the idea.

"That would make me feel even worse!" Tavros exclaimed, knowing that Gamzee would actually do something like that, and not taking it as the condescension most people would.

"Aww. Then what do you want me to do? It's easy for me when we study together so much." Gamzee said, frowning a little at his best friend.

"Nothing. I'm really proud of you, it's just that I'd like to get better grades, too." He said, and Gamzee shrugged.

"Don't got any solutions to that one, bro." Gamzee said, "Hey, maybe uncle K can help you out. He was really good in school. At least that's what Karkat told me." He looked at the sky, s if pondering if this were true or not. He did seem to do quite a bit of pondering lately. Not what one would expect from a goofy guy like Gamzee.

"Uncle K?" Tavros had never heard the name, nor known that Gamzee had an uncle.

"It's Karkat's brother Kankri. He's coming over today, which is why Karkat will actually be home today. Karkat complains about him, but I can tell he really loves him." Gamzee said, smiling and walking a bit faster.

"Wait, as in the ex-governor?"

"Yep! Who would have known mean old Karkat would be related to such a smooth guy. And you have to be smart to get into Harvard, like uncle K did."

"I suppose. It'll be interesting to meet someone like a Governor."

"Karkat said not to make a big deal out of it. Like, don't even give him the title. Apparently he's having a hard time with not being able to have the job anymore."

"Oh, yeah. His term limits are up. Either way, I'm sure he's a really great guy." Gamzee nodded. When they walked into the home, Karkat was sitting in his recliner, glaring at another man who looked nearly identical to him, only about ten years older. The older man, presumably Kankri, was talking away, the words so fast they could barely be understood, while Terezi stared into space.

"I didn't know you'd be here, sis." Tavros said, as Gamzee lifted his chair over the steps into the living room. Their house wasn't handicap accessible, but Gamzee had gained a good bit of muscle by bypassing that fact. He did a lot of lifting his friend, and they mostly stayed downstairs, rather than risking a fall to get to Gamzee's room.

"There's something you two should know, and I figured that it might be easier on you if both of us were here. My fuckass older brother just happened to show up today."

"What's that?" Gamzee said, hands on Tavros' wheelchair tightening.

"Well, we wanted to warn you about going anywhere by yourselves in this town." Terezi said, "Especially now that you've made an enemy of Vriska"

"She can't be that bad. I can protect Tav." Gamzee said, his smile more forced than usual.

"That's what my friend Sollux thought. Then she killed him, and my best friend Aradia because they snuck out without telling anyone." Terezi said, her red-covered eyes staring at them.

"K-killed them? But shouldn't she be in prison, then?" Tavros exclaimed, eyes going wide.

"Sometimes it doesn't work like that, Tav." Gamzee said, knowing that he himself should probably still be locked up for multiple aggravated assault charges.

"It was ruled an accident, but I know it wasn't. Vriska came to their funeral, and even cried, talking about how Aradia was her friend, and that it was such a terrible loss. But as she walked away, I smelled the lie." Terezi said, clenching her fists.

"And either way, that bitch is crazy. Literally. Her parents have brought her into the hospital a few times. I personally diagnosed the bitch with extreme narcissism, but they wouldn't listen to me." Karkat said, knowing full well that he was illegally releasing classified medical information, but not really caring if it kept Gamzee alive.

"You shouldn't use such harsh terms, little brother. Especially since it seems that Tavros doesn't like your strong language." Kankri said, and Karkat glared at him.

"This is not the fucking time for one of your lectures, Kankri. I just found out that my son could be killed by a crazy ass narcissist for taking care of his friend, I'm a little fucking distraught!" Karkat yelled, and Kankri seemed to relent.

"You called me 'son'" Gamzee pointed out, and Karkat blushed red, not realizing the endearing term had come out of his mouth.

"Of course. You're a boy who I'm legally responsible for. That makes you my son. But that's not the point. I'll be getting Gamzee his own car, and he'll be driving you home from now on, Tavros." Karkat said, quickly getting off any line of conversation that may uncover the fact that he actually had emotions.

"Karkat, you can barely pay for your own car, how will you pay for mine, too?" Gamzee asked, his normally whimsical voice becoming more normalized, and logical.

"Kankri is going to be living with us for a while, and contributing monetarily." The younger brother said, and Gamzee sighed.

"I'm sorry. I caused this. Tav was fine before I picked a fight with them." Gamzee said, his head handing down.

"Gamzee don't think that!" Tavros said, his voice uncharacteristically loud and dominant. "You've done nothing but help and protect me!"

"But we didn't have to worry about anyone killing you!" Gamzee yelled back. And as his heart rate increased, he started to hear the whispers that came before the voices.

"Gamzee…" Karkat stood, recognizing that look in Gamzee's eyes.

"Fuck!" Gamzee yelled, clutching his head and running from the room, up the stairs where he knew that Tavros couldn't follow him.

He threw his door open, and went straight for the drawer of his desk. Inside was the small caliber pistol Karkat had gotten him for his eighteenth birthday, simply because he was now old enough to own one. He cocked it for the first time, and put it in his mouth, tears streaming down his face.

He only ever hurt people. His father had been right, he was worthless. He'd never amount to anything but a failure. Karkat could barely afford to put food on the table because of him, and was now having to borrow money from his older brother because trouble followed him everywhere he went. No matter how hard he tried, he could never help anyone, but he took so much from them. But he'd stop taking. He'd admit defeat and let the voices live longer than him, if only for a brief moment.

"Gamzee fucking Makara, what do you think you are doing?" Violet eyes looked at him, practically begging him to just leave. To let him do as he wanted.

"I don't wanna hurt anyone anymore, Karkat." He whispered, as the voices grew louder. In retrospect, giving someone who heard violent voices a gun was a bad idea.

"Just take the pill, and calm down. You know they get worse the more riled up you get."

"I don't wanna keep taking motherfucking pills! I don't wanna have to keep drugging myself out of my head because the real me is too dangerous to let him out into the world. It's better to just end both of us right now, before Tav gets hurt." He growled, finger on the trigger squirming.

"It's not the real you, and you know it. If your worried about Tavros, then how do you think it's gonna end up for him. You're his only friend, the person who protects him, loves him. Do you think that they'll just stop screwing with him because you aren't there, because they won't. They'll put all that pent up rage that they haven't been able to get out because you shielded him and he may very well meet you in the afterlife. Just calm the fuck down, and give me the gun." Karkat demanded, and the voices shouted now.

"He doesn't know you." They said, and Gamzee fell to the floor, covering his ears as if that would shut them out. All he did was make it harder for Karkat to get through.

"Shut up! You're the reason all this is happening." He told the monster as it appeared in front of him.

Suddenly he felt gentle arms around him, just strong enough to apply pressure. It was Karkat, rocking him back and forth, like a small child.

"It's gonna be okay, Gamzee. You're just a little shell-shocked is all. Don't worry, I won't let anything happen to you." He whispered, the soft side he kept hidden pouring out, because Gamzee needed it. He needed to feel the love that would take away the voices of hate. So long as the love coming in was stronger than the hate, he would be fine.

But what did that say about the fact that he kept having episodes with Tavros. Did the love he felt for the cripple not cover up the hate?


	7. Chapter 7

_One month later…_

Kankri had settled in, and Gamzee was set to get a car for them to drive home in, and until that point, they would be walking home, though Terezi had given Tavros a pocket knife. He was to use it if Vriska got close enough that he could, though she had wondered if her softhearted brother would be able to. Of course, after the incident with the gun, giving Gamzee deadly weapons was decided against, and he simply had to rely on his own strength and wit to get through.

They were walking home, and Gamzee, as usual was pushing Tavros.

"Hey Tav?" Gamzee said, staring in front of them rather than looking down at his friend.

"Yeah?"

"Does me pushing you all up and bother you?" He asked, this time meeting brown eyes with his own.

"W-why would you ask that?" Tavros replied, obviously stalling.

"Well, anytime I start pushing you, you blush and all that, so I was wondering if I embarrassed you." He said, his eyes sad at the thought that his best bro would be embarrassed about him.

"I-it isn't you. Just that, well, people think that we're…more than best bros." Tavros said, face flushed and staring at his shoes.

"Oh. So it does bug you, then? Do you want me to stop, then?" He asked, and Tavros thought for a second. He loved the feeling of having Gamzee pushing him. Not only because there wasn't the strain on his arms, but also because he trusted Gamzee to choose the right direction more that he trusted himself. But at the same time, all they needed was another reason for them to stand out, and being the town's only gay couple could insight that.

"I- I don't really know. I just don't want you getting made fun of for it." Tavros responded.

"How about you push yourself until we're away from the crowd, and then I'll push you. That way your arms don't get all up and tired? I like looking at your face better anyway." Gamzee smiled, moving to stand in front of the chair, walking backwards. Tavros smiled, loving how carefree his friend was. Until he stopped the chair, catching sight of the exact person they had planned to avoid, with the football team standing behind her. Vriska.

"Well, if it isn't the little cripple and the crazy clown." Her high-pitched cocky voice rang out, and Gamzee stopped walking as well, though he didn't turn around, his smile turned to an angry scowl.

"Leave, Vriska." He said, his voice lacking its usual happy fluctuations. Gamzee's heart sped up, and the voices started to whisper, telling him to go ahead and kill them. Kill them all so that Tav wouldn't have to be afraid anymore.

"You embarrassed my brother. Do you know that his Girlfriend broke up with him? That little bitch left him, because you beat him."

"What is she talking about, Gamzee?" Tavros asked.

"Then your beef is with me. Tav hasn't done anything to you. He can leave, right?"

"He's your friend, and guilty by association." She responded.

"That was a bad fucking choice. Tav, go get Karkat, and stay at my place. I don't have time to explain, so just do it." Gamzee demanded, his voice so dominant that Tavros was responding to it before he could cognitively make the choice.

"Are you gonna be okay, Gamzee?" Tavros asked, and what answer could Gamzee give him but yes?

"Aren't you the knight in shining armor, Makara?" Vriska cooed, gesturing for one of her lackeys to go after Tavros. The football player was promptly knocked out as Gamzee's hand met the back of his neck. Tavros glanced back, and moved away faster when he saw the insanity spark in Gamzee's eyes as a small dribble of blood came from the fallen boys head where it his the concrete.

"If I kill you, then Tav will be safe. He'll never have to worry about you again." Gamzee said, his voice soft, as he stared at the woman as a bead of sweat rolled down her temple.

"I want his head on a stick." Vriska said, scowling. Gamzee let out a bloodcurdling chuckle as the reluctant boys attacked Gamzee, more afraid of Vriska than him. For the moment, at least.

"Gamzee!" Karkat called as he arrived to find Gamzee surrounded by (hopefully) unconscious boys, and Vriska held up by the hair of her head, other hand closing around her throat. He had a spatter of blood across his face, where the paint had smeared, causing the thing that children likely have clown nightmares about.

"Hey, motherfucker." Gamzee replied, dropping the passed out girl along with her friends.

"Gamzee calm down." Karkat approached him slowly, and patted his head, lulling him down. As his mind returned to itself, he looked around him and started sobbing.

"I told you, Karkat. All I ever do is hurt people."

"But they attacked you. And they would have attacked Tavros. He's more important to you than them, right?" Gamzee nodded, letting himself be led home, make-up smearing more with his tears. As they walked, Karkat noticed that he had a hole and a small cut on his torso where one of the boys had pulled a knife on him. He stopped and took pictures, keeping away from Gamzee's face where he looked downright scary. If they wanted to prosecute, self-defense would defiantly be in order.

Karkat snuck Gamzee in through the back so that Tavros wouldn't see him, and told him to take a shower before coming out. He brought Gamzee a change of clothes, and helped him out of the bathroom on his shaky legs, hair still dripping where he hadn't bothered drying off. He didn't put on any of his make-up, and so the three scars across his face were clearly visible. He went into the living room, where Tavros was waiting with Kankri.

"Gamzee, what happened to your face?" he asked, and Gamzee looked at him questioningly for a moment, as if not remembering that he had scars. In a look of epiphany, he frowned harder.

"They're old. You just couldn't see them past the make-up. But I did promise you an explanation, didn't I?" He said, sitting down.

"I'll tell him if you don't want to, Gamzee." Karkat offered, realizing that Gamzee may have hard time explaining this, or possibly explain it too much at once.

"No. Tav deserves to hear it from the source." Gamzee said, sitting down and looking Tavros in the eye. "You know what Schizophrenia is, right, bro?" He asked, and Tavros nodded.

"Do you have that, then?" Gamzee clenched his fists as Tavros looked slightly scared.

"Yeah. I have a fuckin voice in my head that tells me to hurt people. But the one it's never told me to hurt is you. I guess even that violent fuck can't find a reason to hate you." Gamzee smiled sadly as Tavros recoiled a bit.

"Then even…Karkat?"

"Yeah. Mostly while I was in the hospital. They had to chain me up because I almost killed six people. And Karkat risked being the seventh so that I could get out. And now I've gone and hurt more. I won't be mad if you're afraid of me, Tav. In fact, I encourage it. But I'm far too motherfuckin selfish to push you away if you want to stay with me." Karkat gestured for Kankri to follow him out of the room, saying softly that he would be right down the hall if they needed anything.

"Is that why you're always running off, and coming back all weird?" Tavros asked.

"Yeah. Anytime I'm reminded of how cruel people were to you, the voices act up. They keep telling me that if I killed all of them, that you'd be safe. And I almost fucking listened. Hell, I did. I was ready to kill every last one of them, or at least until they killed me. But Karkat calmed me down. I'm a monster, Tavros." Gamzee told his friend, head falling and hands digging into raven curls, tugging on his hair, small bits of it coming out.

"Stop that, Gamzee. You aren't a monster." Tavros, said, boldness growing inside him as he moved slightly closer to Gamzee, the closest his wheelchair would allow, and lifted the head up to look at him once more.

"I hurt people Tav. I should never have left that hospital. The straps should have stayed right where they were." He held up his arms weakly, and only for a moment, bringing attention to the scars along his wrists.

"No. I've never been happier than when I was with you. I- I love you, Gamzee." Tavros choked out, but Gamzee just looked away.

"You don't have to lie, Tav. Don't say shit like that just to comfort me." Gamzee snapped, a tear running down his cheek.

"I'm not lying! Listen to me!" Tavros nearly shouted, roughly moving Gamzee's face back, and placing a forceful kiss to his slightly chapped lips. Tavros waited for rejection. Waited for Gamzee to push him away and say that he didn't like him like that. But it never came. Instead, he felt himself be picked up, and moved onto the purple boy's lap, as the kiss was returned with equal passion.

"I motherfucking love you so much, Tav. Please, know that I'd never hurt you. I'd rip the voice outta my motherfuckin head with a spoon if it ever suggested it." He growled, his usual vigor returning.

"Don't leave me, Gamzee. I don't know what to do anymore without you." Tavros whispered, as if balancing out his former aggression.

"I never knew what to do without you. I was just lost. You've found me, Tav. Like a Shepard and his motherfuckin lost little sheep." Gamzee whispered back, holding the smaller boy close.

In the hall, watching, Karkat rolled his eyes. _Leave them alone for two seconds, and they're already kissing._ But he had a smile on his face, happy that his son had found someone that he could truly love.

Speaking of love, He dialed Terezi's number, having meant to ask her on a date a few days ago. Yes, the ever-grumpy Karkat was going to try his hand at wooing a girl.

**A/N- The next chapter is going to be nothing but Karezi, and I'll sum up what you need to know in the chapter following it, so if you don't like the pairing you can skip it. Thanks for reading this far, and I hope you review!**


	8. Chapter 8

**So this is the Karezi chapter, and it'll probably be pretty short. Flashbacks are in italics as usual, and there will be a lot of transitions. Hopefully it doesn't bother anyone. (I almost said trigger, since Kankri is my new favorite character. lol)**

_Terezi was sitting on her front porch, a newly purchased light yellow sundress sliding across smooth legs in the warm spring afternoon. Dave would be here to pick her up any time now, and her heart was souring and beating like a hummingbird at the thought of her hipster cowboy. He was taking her on a surprise date, and she wasn't allowed to know where until they arrived. _

She stood in front of her home, making sure that Gamzee and Tavros knew the rules. They were not to open the door, she had keys and could use them just fine; they were not to answer the phone if they didn't know who it was, and she would be calling Tav's cell should she need to communicate with him. They were not to leave the house unless it was an emergency, or she had Okayed it previously. Tavros nodded, while Gamzee watched a butterfly roll past. She sighed, thinking that this would not end well. At least that's how she was explaining the butterflies in her stomach this time around. It wasn't that she had gone and fallen in love with the stupid, yelly idiot that was Karkat Vantas. That was ridiculous.

_She got into his vinyl lined Mustang convertible, almost forgetting to cross her legs after being used to wearing pants for so long. She had re done her hair three times before finally just giving up and calling Aradia. Luckily she hadn't been with Sollux, or she would have come up with a lame excuse not to come. The quite beauty had helped her become prettied up, and just in time. It wasn't three minutes until Dave had pulled up._

Karkat's car was the junkiest muscle car Terezi had ever seen, and she rolled her eyes. She put her black jean, tee shirt clad self into his passenger seat, and her hair brushed but little more. She was wearing no make-up save her blue-raspberry lip-balm, which she always had on; making her look like she was oxygen deprived most of the time. He was blushing as she clicked on her seatbelt, and turned his radio on.

"So where are you taking me again?" She asked, eyes closed as she tried to find the seek button.

"Tell me when I find your station," He said, flicking the button himself, "And you can't know until we get there. A secret, I guess."

"That's fucking bullshit." She said, her raspy voice turning into a pout. It hadn't always been that way. Only since she had screamed for an hour and a half straight. The night of the triple-funeral of nearly everyone she loved. But that was a story for another time, preferably never.

"Yeah, well, deal with it." He said, refusing to meet her eye, instead staring at the empty road intently. She sighed, wondering why she had even agreed to this. Oh yeah, because seeing her little brother with his boyfriend had made her feel too lonely to ignore the slightly familiar scent rolling off of her in waves. Tiny waves, which only she could detect, but waves nonetheless.

"_Can't you give me one teensy hint?" She asked, and Dave, being the cool kid he was, had of course, simply stared forward, a cocky smirk painting the parts of his face not covered by those ridiculous shades. Of course, she would prefer he take them off, but she didn't want him going blind from sun exposure, so you left them where they were. _

"_If I gave you a hint, it wouldn't be a secret, would it?" He said, and you pouted, though that had never worked for you in the past._

"_Please, Dave?"_

"_Fine. I guess I'll tell you, but you aren't allowed to laugh at the sappy bullshit." He said, taking a moment to glare accusingly at her, the gesture getting through his glasses._

"_I pinky promise." She held up her finger, and he sighed._

"_We're going to my Bro's grave. It's his birthday, and I always bring him some flowers, and a fucking manga book. He loved the shit." Dave said, and your hummingbird heart turned into a rock, and you felt bad for bugging him now._

"_Oh. I'm sorry, then." She said, staring at the ground as alternative rock poured from the speakers._

"_You didn't kill him, some jackass with a knife did. Fucking three dollars was all he had. They say that he tried to save some kid who was getting mugged for drug money, and picked the wrong one." Dave's hands gripped the steering wheel harder, and she almost thought she heard a sob. _

"_Pull over for a second." she ordered, and, like the perfect gentleman he is, he listens. They are on the side of the abandoned road, and she lifted you from her seat, and into his lap._

"_What are you doing?" He asked, and she simply snaked her arms around his neck, placing a small kiss to the top of his blonde head._

"_You looked like you needed cheering up. I know that this is a sad day, but that doesn't mean I want to have you being all depressed, silly." She responded, smiling that contagious smile of hers._

"Come on, Karkles, We're going to need to have an idea where I'm going. You aren't really the sanest person, and I don't go to strange places with crazy people." She snapped, glaring at him, or at least the direction she thought was his.

"Fine." He relented, frowning harder, "We're going to an orchestra concert. I saw that you had Mozart and all that shit in you're house, and I figured that you would enjoy it. If not, we can go have dinner and I can romantically read to you about steak." He said, the car going a little faster as he became annoyed.

"That's…thank you." She said, never thinking that he would have taken the time to see what was in her house, especially since she had never let him in it. He must have peeked in when he came to pick up Gamzee.

"You're…you're welcome." His cheeks grew red, not really knowing what to do when they strayed from their usual banter.

"Really. It's more thoughtful than anything else anyone has ever done for me." She said, placing her hand on his in the center of the dash. He smiled, but then immediately quelled the expression. Not before she saw it however, maintaining the notion herself.

_He had calmed down, and when the tears no longer threatened his eyes, she had allowed him to begin driving again. He told stories of his older brother, admitting he had never known him by any name but "Bro" until the funeral, when the name "Dirk Strider" was announced. He had almost thought he was in the wrong place, until he realized that there was only one dead strider. At least in reality. He told her of how dead inside he had felt, even saying that sometimes he thought that his brother, six feet in the ground and worm poop by now, was more alive than him. He proceeded to stipulate that his only reprieve from this feeling was with her, which brought a tear to her eye._

_There were plenty of happy stories, like how he had walked in on his brother watching hentai once, and had completely freaked out, as any fourteen year old would. Or how, on his first day of school, his brother had sent him in anime cosplay, simply because he could. This made her chuckle, especially the blush that still came to his face at the former tale. In the end, they were both on a bi-polar roller coaster of stories and the emotions they invoked, especially with the wonderfully descriptive way Dave had of telling them. She had put in on one occasion that he should consider being a writer._

"If we're going to an orchestra, shouldn't we be dressed better?" Terezi asked, not even knowing if her clothing matched, though she thought that she had smelled purple and black jeans.

"What are they gonna do, fuckin kick us out. They can suck my dick." Karkat said, happy to be able to have him normal response to anything.

" I wouldn't say that; it's a hard offer to refuse, Karkles." She said, mostly to watch his eyes go wide as his face became redder than her converse sneakers, and chuckle under her breath at his reaction.

"DAMMIT TEREZI, STOP SAYING SHIT LIKE THAT WHILE I'M OPERATING HEAVY MACHINERY!" He shouted, which only made her laugh harder. He started cursing under his breath as she continued to laugh so hard her face turned red and her red glasses fell off.

"But your face… I can't… BREATHE" She said, wasting the breath she claimed to be missing on the words. He scowled, but on the inside he was smiling, if only to be able to hear her real laugh, and not the fake one she used when she laughed at her own awful jokes.

_They were standing over Dirk's grave, and Dave was placing a single white lily on the simple marker, as well as the latest volume of Naruto. Dirk had come from this town, and had asked to be buried here, being why Dave used part of his inheritance to move from the city to the small town, something everyone thought him crazy for. _

_She was frowning in sadness, as once again tears fell from her eyes. She was happy that he had shared this with her, showing a great deal of trust, but at the same time, to simply have such an emotional thing pressed onto her so suddenly was taking an emotional toll._

They sat in the middle of the auditorium as the curtains opened, reveling a group of instruments. Classical music began to slowly glide from strings and breath, to the waiting ears of those present. Terezi had a soft smile, the music lulling her into a sort of trance as she calmed from her constant state of faked happiness, to one of truly feeling the emotion. She barely even noticed when Karkat pulled the trick so old it was out dated when they wrote the book, and yawned to put his arm around her shoulders. Nevertheless, she responded, leaning in to lean on his lithe chest. His face turned red once more, and he wanted to look away, but that expression of pure bliss was hard to stop looking at, and he was quickly becoming addicted to it.

"This is wonderful." She said softly, the rasp not catching so much when she spoke at this tone.

"Glad you like it." He said, truly meaning it. His heart was about to pound out of his chest while it thrummed like a snare drum, but that was beside the point. The point was that he had made the beautiful woman he had, even if he would never admit it to any but himself, fallen in love with.

_Terezi fell asleep on the ride home, and when Dave woke her up by loudly blaring the radio to make her jerk awake, she scowled at him. Still, he walked her to the door, and she looked up at him expectantly. He caught on, and tilted her head to his, placing a kiss upon it. Like all the ones before it, it was nice, and left her feeling a little tingly. She parted from him, and stepped inside, waving a final farewell as the night ended._

They joked through the ride home, mostly Terezi baiting Karkat into various levels of annoyance by badly singing along to his favorite cheesy love songs. He yelled at her, saying that Adam Sandler was the king of romantic comedies, and she had to be some kind of moron to think differently. She replied that he had to be gay to watch romantic comedies without having a girl next to him. He scoffed, and she giggled.

They arrived at her home, and, like the gentleman that rested deep under his prickly façade, he walked her to her door, biting his lower lip like it was a piece of bubblegum. She laughed a little, and looked at him, waiting. He'd get the message eventually.

"I had a really nice time, Karkles." She said, and he flashed another small smile, leaning in a little bit, but then starting to lean back. Instead of simply letting him get out of her good-night kiss, she grabbed him by the black sweater, and dragged his lips to hers, gasping as sparks flew like a fourth of July fireworks show. He returned the kiss immediately, wrapping warm hands around her lower back, and flicking his tongue out. He may not have much practice, but he didn't read romance novels for nothing. Okay, he did, but that is neither here nor there.

"Can I see you next weekend?" He asked, and she smirked, looking him in the eye.

And then those eyes went wide.

"I. I can see you!" She said, looking at all of the intricate features of the human face she had forgotten.

"Yeah, it's not like anyone can tell you not to…" He was confused, until she smiled, jumping up and down.

"You don't understand, Karkles, I can _see._ As in, my vision is back!" She exclaimed, and he was shocked.

At the racket, she saw Gamzee's face looking through the glass of their front door, opening it up to see what was going on.

"What's got you flippin' yo wicked shit, sis?" He asked, eyebrow going up in confusion.

"I can see!" She said, running up to look at her little brother, waiting in his room upstairs.

"Bro, are you _that_ good?" Gamzee asked, and Karkat, never one to pass up an ego opportunity, replied in the affirmative.

"Like fucking Jesus."

**So not so short, but whatever. Hope you enjoyed the side pairing that I'm slamming down your throats!**

**Anyway, thank you for reading, and reviews make me update faster!**


	9. Chapter 9

**Summation: Terezi and Karkat went on a date, she realized she loved him and not the dead Dave, she got her sight back. We're over the hump of halfway, well so, I believe, so thanks to everyone who read, and special thanks to reviewers/favoriters!**

"So, Tav, you like my new ride?" Gamzee said, smiling at the 90's Honda. Most people would have considered it a piece of junk, but Gamzee were happy to have anything, not the type to take things for granted.

"It drives, right?"

"Like a charm. Smoother ride than the Mustang." He replied to the younger boy, grinning his face off.

"Looks great. Are we ready to go?" They were standing in autumn chill, heading out to school. Gamzee nodded, lifting his boyfriend into the passenger seat, and stealing a quick kiss as he did so. They had established, solely on the will of the smaller party, that there would be no PDA, but Gamzee liked to chip at the rules every now and again, saying that the car wasn't public, so they could do whatever they wanted in it. He always got a mildly agitated pout from Tavros, but by the time he put the chair in the trunk and walked around, it was gone, and he was back to his adorable, happy self.

"This is gonna be so sweet. We can go wherever we want, bro. I can all up and take you on legit dates and everything." Gamzee said, starting the foreign car, and, as he had promised, the ride was like gliding on air.

"Is that the only reason you wanted a car, Gamzee?" Tavros asked, his cheeks flushing a bit.

"Well, I never left the house until I started hanging out with you, and I don't know anyone else and going out alone is just all up and depressing for a motherfucker, so pretty much, yeah. No point in a car if you don't go anywhere." Gamzee replied, taking his eyes from the road a moment and giving Tavros a small smile, though immediately returning them. He had heard enough about deadly car crashes, and he didn't want Tav to think that it was unsafe to drive with him.

"Oh. I guess that makes two of us, then." Tavros looked around as if someone might see, before placing his hand in Gamzee's larger, warm one. The driver responded with a tight, short squeeze, and a smile. He still wore his make-up when they were out, but he had stopped wearing it when it was just the two of them, seeing as how Tav already saw the scars. He had yet to tell the other about how he had gotten them, and Tav had yet to actually ask. It was a mutual unspoken agreement, and really it would have just been depressing anyway.

"By the way, did Kankri help you with those literature things? I tried, but you said you still didn't get it." Gamzee asked, pulling into the school parking lot, which was mostly open, seeing as how every home was within walking distance of here.

"Yeah. He talked like Shakespeare the entire time, so that I would learn to read it, though, so it took a while." Tavros said, and Gamzee laughed a little.

"He is up and a little much sometimes, but he's an alright motherfucker at heart. He just wants to help anyone he can." The clown said, and Tav nodded. Gamzee got out of the car, and came around with the chair, lifting Tavros into it, and not missing the opportunity to grab his ass as he did so, earning him a cute blush, and a glare. They balanced out to a positive in Gamzee's mind, and he simply started pushing him into class. They got the same stares as they usually did, but the surprising part was when Equius walked up to them, a purpose in his stride, and his cheeks flushed a bit. Gamzee immediately stepped in front of the cripple, in a protective stance.

"I am not here to cause you any harm." The other said, looking down, and sweating a little bit.

"Then what do you want?" Gamzee snapped.

"I…wish to apologize, both for myself as well as my sister. She gets a bit extreme in her methods, and I now understand that there was no reason to be so harsh to either of you. I understand that we will likely never be _friends_, but I hope that we can cease being enemies." He said, gulping and holding out a clammy palm. Gamzee looked at it for a moment, and took it, hoping Tavros still had that bottle of hand sanitizer.

"I'm cool with you, motherfucker, but I don't know about Tav. You cool with him, Tav?" Gamzee said, looking at the embarrassed cripple. Everyone was watching the display, and he simply nodded a little, curling up in the tightest ball he could while remaining in a sitting position.

"Thank you. I will also attempt to have the others apologize for their maltreatment as well, though my sister will likely remain angry." He said, before rushing off as the bell rang. At the sound, Gamzee grabbed the chair, and started running, knowing that Tavros hated moving so fast, but seeing no other option. Ironically, they were called to the office right as they ran in. Gamzee made a pouting noise, and slowly walked back out, dragging the chair behind him.

"G-Gamzee, turn me around!" Tavros said, not liking having no view of where he was going. It wasn't that he didn't trust Gamzee, it was simply built into him that he should know where he was going.

"Sorry, bro." the other mumbled, moving to the proper pushing position.

When they arrived in the office, the principal was talking with a man in a white lab coat, and Tavros felt Gamzee's grip on the chair tighten at the sight. He had never had good experiences with doctors.

"Relax, son. I'm here to offer your friend quite the opportunity." The doctor said, his voice deep, and slightly raspy, the voice of a southern man who had smoked for years, but still remained strong. He was middle aged, mid-forties maybe, and he had smile lines deep into his tan skin, around shocking blue eyes.

"What do you mean?" Tavros asked, always having had trusted doctors. He'd be dead without them, after all.

"Let me ask you this: How would you like to walk again?"

"C-can you do that?" Tavros asked, eyes going wide in anticipation. With a satisfied smile, the doctor nodded.

"I am here to see if you would be interested in being a test subject in the newest in prosthetics. I can make you fully functional, fully feeling limbs." He said, and tears of joy worked their way into both sets of young eyes.

"So…Tav will feel everything, then?" Gamzee asked, hugging the boy from behind, hoping that didn't count as PDA, but figuring it was appropriate either way.

"Yes. Of course, there will have to be an operation to remove his current legs, but that would be losing nothing but dead weight anyway."

"That would be great. C-can I call my sister and tell her?"

"We've already called and asked her to come up here. She is taking the day off work to bring you to my office. We called Mr. Makara up to see if he would like to go with you." Gamzee of course jumped at the chance. Tav walking again was like a bucket of miracles, poured into a miraculous pool of gloriousness. Gamzee couldn't think of any better news that could have been waiting for him. Huge smiles were on both of their faces, and if anything, Gamzee's was bigger.

A month later, Gamzee was in the waiting room of the hospital, still made uneasy by the medical surroundings, and hoping to God no one noticed him, but still needing to be there for Tavros. He had washed off his make-up, or rather, not put it on. He felt exposed, naked without the familiar white cream, but Tavros had asked him to make sure that his _real_ face was the first thing he saw when he woke up from the surgery.

He had a math book out, doing the problems that were assigned to them over the weekend, but he couldn't really focus on matrix multiplication when the love of his life would soon be able to walk with him. He wondered how tall Tavros would be when he could stand, or how strong the legs were. He thought of the two of them wrestling around, and it ending in a long kiss. He even imagined the two of them finding a field of flowers and frolicking in them. A smile stayed on his lips his eyes closed in thought. After six hours, he had two problems done, and had imagined nearly everything that could be done with the shy boy's new legs. As he was starting to repeat the imaginings, the doctor came in and told him that Tavros would soon be waking up. Terezi was already there, having been one of the nurses working with the surgeon, and Gamzee packed up his things, running to the room like a horde of zombies were chasing him.

When Tavros opened brown eyes, he saw what he had asked for, a smiling, make-up free Gamzee, who proceeded to place a small kiss to his forehead before he could even open his mouth to ask how it had gone. By the fact that no one was freaking the fuck out, he assumed that it had at least not gone badly.

"So…do I have legs again?" Tavros asked, sitting up, and his eyes going wide when he felt the sensation of cloth against his toes when his legs moved with the rest of his body. Tears filled his eyes, and he swung the legs across the bed to hang over it, swaying a bit from the lack of blood in his body due to the surgery.

"How's it feel, Tav?" Gamzee said, taking the right leg and moving a finger in tiny hearts along the synthetic skin coated metal.

"Wonderful, Gam-Gam." He was still under the hold of the anesthetic, and he was saying weird things like the pet name he had always wanted to use, but never had the courage.

"Not as wonderful as the one feeling it." Gamzee said, "Nothing could be that motherfucking wonderful." Tavros blushed, and tried to stand, shaky but exited, like the straw man in Wizard of Oz.

"I didn't realize that I was so tall." Tavros said, nearly reaching his lanky boyfriend in height.

"Hmm…Now I can't kiss the top of your head," Gamzee pouted, standing on his toes to try and reach but just missing. "I guess everything has its trade offs."

"Gamzee, don't be silly." Tavros lightly smacked his shoulder. Meanwhile, Terezi had ushered the doctor out, and was watching the happiness on her little brother's face with a mirrored expression. She had always blamed herself for his injury. If she had gone, then she could have saved him, or that if Dave hadn't been coming to see her, then there would have been no wreck at all. But now, she had released that guilt, and seeing him standing swatted out the nest for its return. It was all okay now, and she would have killed to keep that smile on his face.

"How's the kid?" Karkat asked, still in his scrubs as well, but spending his lunch breaks here with his son and his girlfriend.

"Happy enough to let yours play with his new legs like kinky sex-toys, which is pretty happy." She answered quietly, watching Gamzee kiss every inch of the legs, from the tip of the artificial toes, to the thighs where they met his real skin. But in spite of her discretion, speaking had made Tavros remember that there were other people in the room, and he pushed Gamzee off his as gently as he could, earning a pout from his lover.

"No, go ahead. I'm sure I could film this and put it on some cripple porn sight, since that's the only place that display would have been appropriate. Try to control yourselves. I know you're teenagers but Jesus." Karkat said, making everything overdramatic as usual. Tavros, however, must not have realized this, in that he blushed darker than the others thought physically possible, using what blood was left in his body to blush, and using his new legs to turn around and curl into the fetal position, wanting the floor to open up and eat him.

"Aww, come on Tav. Don't be all up and ignoring me. I just had to get to know the new parts of you is all." Gamzee said, pouting, his violet eyes growing big and hid lower lip jutting ever so slightly.

"What happened to no PDA, Gamzee?" he pouted as well, his brain losing the happy effect of the drugs, and understanding that was embarrassed as fuck. Not that Terezi and Karkat were any better, seeing as how the latter's hand was currently massaging the former's left buttock.

**A/N- Tav has legs, and it's all cool. Only two or three more chapters to go!**


	10. Chapter 10

It was nearly winter now, and all of the leaves were falling, or had already done so, there reds and oranges painting a normally green landscape, adding color to the dying grass and freezing soil. The air was just cold enough that you could make out your breath in it, but not enough to bite. More like a soft nibble, that could be avoided with a jacket. Not when most people would be outdoors, but nevertheless a joint family picnic was planned for thanksgiving break. Terezi would be picked up by Karkat, and Gamzee would bring Kankri along to get Tavros. Upon protest, Gamzee was informed that just because he was an adult didn't mean that he and Tavros got to do anything they wanted, and with the trigger police following along, they wouldn't be able to get into anything that would make them late. Gamzee had pouted, but had no choice but to agree.

And so this was how he ended up in the car being scolded for holding Tavros' hand, while the smaller man sat and giggled, thinking the eye twitch that had only developed when Kankri moved in.

"It isn't funny, Tav! And there is nothing wrong with either my handholding or my driving." Gamzee said, pulling over to glare at his uncle. "I'll hold his hand, and you know what? I may even give him a motherfucking hug, and there is nothing you can do about it." This wasn't his crazy, kill people anger, but simple, normal annoyance, and he was happy to note that, although his heart rate increased, there were no voices to be found. To prove his point, however, Gamzee pulled Tavros into a deep kiss, making sure Kankri saw their tongues. Tavros gave the adult an apologetic look, and stunted the kiss as much as his teenage hormones would let him. Moments later, Gamzee pulled away, panting.

"That…was…oh my gosh…" Kankri was blushing dark red, making his sweater look pink by comparison. Without his make-up, Gamzee could look quite intimidating with his dagger-glare, and Kankri silently watched them hold hands for the remainder of the car ride to the field.

When they got to the large oak tree that marked their destination, Gamzee pulled over, right next to the mustang. He got out, walking around to open Tavros' door before his seatbelt was undone. He missed being able to get in an ass-grab as he lifted him out and into his chair, but watching his new legs maneuver out of the vehicle, moving with more grace than those who had always had the ability to use their limbs was an okay substitute. He let Kankri let himself from the car, and walked over to where Karkat was glaring at Terezi who was trying to feed him candy corn, a food he had long since hated.

"He'll never eat it, Terezi. I tried every Halloween since he was four months old." Kankri called, thankfully not being a rat and telling Karkat about his pull over make-out session.

"I don't know." Gamzee said, grinning the grin he only had right before he was about to make a dirty joke "If he had the same reasons to keep you happy as he does her, something would be pretty motherfuckin wrong with this picture."

"Gamzee!" Tavros shouted, meanwhile, Kankri just turned red again.

"What? Tav you're turning seventeen in a week, and I can't make dirty jokes around you? Do I need to keep you away from Kankri?"

"Still, It's my sister!"

"Fine. I'd rather talk about _our_ sex life instead." Gamzee, his mind no longer clouded with the pills he had taken four or five of every day, had a sharp, if a bit sexual, wit, and he was happy to use it for flirting purposes.

"We don't have one!" He loved the way Tavros sounded when he shouted; much better than his self-conscious stutter.

"I can fix that." Gamzee whispered, moving to kiss where the other's jaw met his ear, resulting in Tavros shoving him away, he and Kankri equal shades of crimson. Gamzee just laughed, and sat down, grabbing a sandwich.

"You're such a perv, Gamzee. I don't know how Tavros puts up with you." Karkat said, a sly grin on his face. Coincidentally, he had been a lot less grumpy since about the third date he and Terezi had.

"I am not. But we've been together for almost three months, and he barely lets me do anything." Kankri excused himself, mumbling something about needing to use the bathroom, and wandering into the field. Terezi just chuckled.

"Just let him tap it once, Tavros. For my sake if nothing else. I'm getting tired of hearing your name in the dead of night." Karkat said, and this time it was this chill Gamzee who turned bright red, though his partner was far from pale.

"What are you talking about, Karkat? I have no idea what you mean?" Gamzee lied, looking away in embarrassment.

"Oh. Must be dreams then. Almost every night, all I hear is 'oh God Tavbro, right there…yes.'" Karkat imitated a voice laced with lust, and Gamzee gave him a glare that held not daggers, but machetes. Not that it kept the two remaining adults from laughing.

"Yeah, yeah. Like I wanna hear you talk about Terezi's boobs for half an hour every time you come home from a date? I don't even _like_ boobs. I'm gay." Gamzee said, hoping to embarrass his guardian, but watching it fail miserably as Karkat simply shrugged.

"They're nice. What do you want from me?" He said, causing Terezi to "aww" as if he had given her a real complement.

"I give up." Gamzee said, "I'm gonna go drink bleach now." He said, though obviously making no movements to get up.

"C-can we just eat now? Tavros asked, being the only one with any sort of decency still present.

"Fine. I hope you like Peanut butter and jelly. It's all I brought." Karkat said, seeing as how he had been in charge of the sandwiches.

The meal was done, and Karkat and Terezi were cuddling under the tree while Gamzee played one-one-one tag with Tavros, deciding that should he catch the other, he got a kiss in return. Because of the stakes, Tavros would sometimes let himself be captured, only to use the mechanical legs that never got tired to quickly chase Gamzee down again. the elder boy called it cheating, but Tavros insisted the robotics made up for the slight height difference. Kankri was still off by himself, watching the sun set, laying in the yellow grass, happy to simply enjoy nature.

It wasn't until a sixth person arrived that the happiness died. None other than Vriska appeared, and gathered everyone's attention with the cocking of a gun. Gamzee wished that he had brought his pills with him. His normal morning dose wasn't nearly enough to keep the voices from whispering when he saw her face. Not only did he move in front of Tavros, but he also ensured that he was the closest to her of everyone, not wanting any of the people he cared about to get hurt.

Suddenly, the cloudy sky unleashed a crack of lightning, hitting only yards away, the dry grass catching fire, as wind started picking up. Gamzee snarled like an animal, and Karkat moved in front of Terezi, while Kankri started walking back toward the group.

"You enjoy taking things from me, don't you, crazy clown?" She snapped, lifting it at none of them in particular.

"The only thing I should take from you is the life you use only to hurt the people I love." Gamzee replied, the wind getting stronger and whipping his hair around to showcase maddening eyes.

"Gamzee! Tavros shouted, hoping his voice could bring his lover back from the cliff of insanity.

"I love Tavros more than you ever could. I was only trying to make him stronger!" She shouted above the gale.

"I was strong _for_ him! And you can't love anyone other than yourself!"

"We'll see whose stronger, little clown." She had tears pooling in her eyes, but no one really felt pity for her at the moment, "When I take the people you love. I'll take your brother like you did mine!" She aimed the gun at Karkat, and fired. Blood spurted everywhere, and the Vantas fell.

Just not the one that had been the intended target.

"Brother!" Karkat yelled, catching Kankri as he fell, clutching the hole in his chest.

"You haven't called me that in so long. If I had known this was what it took, I would have gotten shot years ago." Kankri joked, coughing up some of the blood pooling in his punctured lung.

"Dammit, what are you saying? Why the FUCK would you try something like that? Don't you get that you're more important than me?" Karkat shouted, punching the dirt beneath them in his frustration. He was a year away from being a medical doctor, but had no clue how to save his own brother.

"No I'm not. And I never was." He said, but was interrupted by Tavros stepping forward.

"Vriska what the HELL is your problem?" The usually shy boy yelled, his fists clenched. "You can't do things like this!"

"I can do whatever I want! And if I can't have you, then this crazy son of a bitch defiantly can't." She snarled, another shot ringing out, as crimson flew from the smallest boy. Gamzee's head was spinning. The voices that had been but whispers before were a cacophonous chorus of hatred, and tears of rage boiled out of his violet eyes.

"Tav?" Gamzee fell to his knees next to the youngest, which was lying on the grass with his paling face illuminated by the orange and scarlet flames. When he failed to respond, Gamzee let loose the most bloodcurdling of screams, leaving Terezi to tend to him as he ran at Vriska, no real reason to live other than to ensure she didn't at this point. He barely registered the bullet as it tore through his arm, the same flesh that pulled back to land in her face.

The punch sent her to the ground, but she kept strong hold of the gun, aiming it to fire again, but having it put off course when Gamzee took her arm and cracking it over his knee. She let go with a scream, and he grabbed it, pointing it at her head.

"He kept telling us that killing you would make Tav sad. But now there is no Tav, and there is no Gamzee. I killed him, and now I will kill you for taking the Tavros away from us." Gamzee's voice said, though it was clearly not the happy, jovial boy controlling the lips.

"Fine. But you'll be blamed for all of this. You're the one holding the gun, and you have a history of violence." Vriska said, thinking that this could work to her advantage. She got a laugh in the face.

"We will be going to see the Tavros soon enough. Far before you're police can harm me." They said, as the voice was more of a legion in one, really.

She had no more smart comments. She had no more witty escapes, and she could only look up at Karma as he pulled the trigger.

Karkat had no idea what to do. His brother was dying in his arms, and the boy who he had come to see as a son was essentially dead as well. Terezi was still alive, but if Tavros died, he feared that she'd retreat into the same grief fueled train wreck that she had been in before.

"Be strong, little brother. There's a reason that everyone always leans on you. It's because they see someone with the strength to do what they must. You've always been the action, Karkat, even when I came up with the pretty words…" Kankri said, smiling, before his head lolled back. No matter how much CPR Karkat did, the heartbeat wouldn't start again, and the blood was slowly dripping out, like spilled syrup, rather than the lively waterfall it had been before. Pale peach had become ashen grey, and warm kindness had become cooling sadness, as tears ran like rivers down Karkat's face.

"And you, motherfucker…" Gamzee turned to him, the gun on the floor, but his eyes shining with bloodlust, his paintless face now covered in blood. "You were always the one to put me away. You were the one who kept me from winning all this time."

"Where is Gamzee?" Karkat demanded, standing up to look the other in his empty eyes.

"He's dead as the others. You can never save anyone, not even the one who you put your very soul into." Gamzee's hand shot out, grabbing him by the throat, only to be stopped by a single phrase, from trembling lips.

"Gamzee, please come back to me…" Tavros said, sitting up in his sister's arms, tears rolling down pale cheeks. Intelligence flared back into his eyes, and he dropped Karkat, looking around. He dropped to the ground once more, and they heard sirens as the emergency services arrived, summoned by the smoke from the flame. The wind weakened, almost as if had fed solely off of Gamzee's hate for others, which was now consumed by his hatred for himself.

"I'm sorry Tav…" He whispered, wrapping his arms around his own lanky frame, suddenly feeling a chill that his jacket could never keep out: The chill of a killer.


	11. Chapter 11

Tavros awoke in the familiar surroundings of a hospital room, bright light causing his eyes to burn for a moment as they adjusted. This time, instead of seeing his lover's smiling face, he looked over to see Karkat sobbing on his sister's shoulder, as she tried to share what little they had between them. He also noticed the distinct lack of Gamzee in the room, and this alarmed him. All that could play in his head was the windy afternoon that had landed him here.

"_He is dead… We killed him…"_ Tears pricked his eyes as well, hoping that it wasn't true. That all of this had been a horrid dream, and that he was waking up after the surgery. Yes a month and a half was a long dream, but denial is a powerful thing.

"Where is Gamzee?" He squeaked out, and they turned to him, as if not even remembering that he was there.

"He's…in the hospital…" Karkat said, not meeting the boy's eyes.

"What do you mean? For an injury, or did you let them lock him away again?" Tavros stood, the IV pulling on his arm. He ripped it out, angry at the possibility that Karkat had let him be strapped down like a frog, ready for dissection.

"The Schizophrenia doesn't seem to be the problem, rather that we can't convince him that you aren't dead. Even showing him your vitals doesn't do anything but make him angry. He had to be sedated so that he wouldn't scratch out his own veins." Terezi explained, trying to keep it as light as one could put this. There were only so many ways to tell a teenager that his boyfriend was trying to kill himself because you had been in a coma.

"How long?" Tavros asked, seemingly angrier than before, looking around as if he thought there should be something there.

"About three weeks. Calm down, Tavros!" Karkat shouted, but the distressed teen refused.

"If there isn't a change of clothing in my hands in ten seconds, I'm going to see him in the hospital gown." Tavros demanded, holding out his hand and beginning the count. Terezi reached into her bag and produced a pair of jeans and a black long sleeved tee shirt. He put the pants on, and removed the gown, throwing the shirt on as he left the room, bracelet still around his wrist, and his shoulder throbbing where the injury remained. From not using the muscles, his legs would have been too weak to carry him had they been real. It was a perk to having mechanical legs. He followed the signs to the psych ward, where he asked for Gamzee's room.

"I'm sorry, this patient isn't allowed visitors due to violent behavior." The clerk said, looking at his strangely.

"What. Fucking. Room?" Tavros demanded, adrenaline making him not really care if he had just said the first curse word of his life.

"Fine, 205, but please allow me to call an escort, sir…"

"I don't need one. He won't hurt me." Tavros called back, already running to find the room. When he opened the door, he saw what appeared to be a torture chamber. Gamzee had a ball in his mouth, and was straining against leather straps.

No, he wasn't straining, he was simply rubbing his wrists against their rubber-coated interior, as if trying to create friction. Tearstains covered his face, and his hands had been placed in casts that prevented their movement. He could do nothing but writhe like a worm about to be placed upon the hook, and Tavros was appalled. He nearly puked at the sight; blood caked to Gamzee's chin and arms, as if no one had bothered to clean him up all this time.

"Oh God, Gamzee, look at me." Tavros said, running up to him, moving the head to stare at him as he started removing restraints.

"Why does my head torture me like this. Tav is dead! That fucking whore killed him!" Gamzee shouted, though he showed no signs of violence.

"No, Gamzee, I was hurt, but I'm alive. I'm so sorry I wasn't there for you…" Tavros whispered, kissing his right hand as he took off the finger casts.

"You can't be Tav. The real Tav wouldn't have anything to do with a disgusting piece of shit like me. Tav can't be tainted by a murderer." Gamzee sobbed, though he stroked Tavros' face nonetheless.

"Then how are you touching me, Gamzee? I'm here because I love you, and not even death could keep me from telling you that one more time." Tavros said, clasping the larger hand on his face with his own.

"I've had stranger dreams. Dreams filled with more than just touching. They're always so real, but they never are…" Gamzee replied, his eyes still foggy.

"What happened to you Gamzee? What happened to miracles?"

"She took them away when she took Tav."

"But _I'm_ Tavros. Gamzee listen to me!" He whined, and pouted. Suddenly, Gamzee's eyes cleared up, and a moment later he wrapped the smaller boy in a tight hug.

"I've yet to see anything, dream or fantasy, that can make that little face. It really is you." Gamzee whispered, rocking the boy back and forth.

"Out of everything, and you recognize my pout?" Tavros laughed a little.

"Why would you come back? You saw the monster that I am. I _killed_ someone, Tav. I'm a murderer." Gamzee said, fresh tears following the tracks of countless others shed before.

"No. You aren't. Even if it really was you who had killed her, you were only protecting the people you care about. She had already shot two people, and was about to shoot more. She shot _you!_" Tavros tried to explain.

"Doesn't matter. I gave in to the monster. I handed him the key, without so much as a fight. It was my entire fault. I almost killed Karkat…the only reason I'm not dead now is you. I didn't want you to see another corpse, and I still don't."

"Then please, even if you can't see the beauty in you, trust me to know that it's there." Tavros said, placing a kiss to the shoulder that his head was resting on until Gamzee decided to let go.

"I suppose that'll have to work. I can't have you being sad." Gamzee conceded, frowning, but still nuzzling his boyfriend.

"Let's get you cleaned up, okay?" Tavros suggested, and Gamzee nodded, getting up and walking to the shower. Tavros stripped his shirt and pants off, leaving his boxers on. Gamzee, of course, had only the gown on, and had no choice but to leave him naked.

Tavros blushed, but started the water nonetheless. Gamzee had seen his lower half in boxers after the surgery, and there was really not a difference. Or at least that's what the boy told himself as his face turned a bright crimson he preceded to blame on the steam as he watched Gamzee bathe, so that he wouldn't do anything stupid while he was alone and unstrapped. Tavros was also showering himself, as he could feel it had been just as long since his last cleansing.

They were both rubbing shampoo through their hair when Karkat came in, and gave them a disgusted expression.

"Really… Of all times you two picked now?" He asked, Terezi walking in behind him.

"You never have kinky hospital shower sex with me." She pouted, and Tavros almost passed out with embarrassment.

"It isn't like that!" Gamzee protested, though usually he would have been the one simply sitting back and watching his partner blush.

"Uh-huh. Sure, Gamzee." Karkat said, covering his eyes. He had no desire to see either of them naked.

"Really, he was just covered in dirt, and I wanted to get him clean, and I needed to get clean too, and so we figured that we would shower together." Tavros explained, still mad at them for letting Gamzee go like that for so long.

"Yeah, I know kid. Just hurry up, so the doctor can see that Gamzee's okay." Karkat relented, sighing and walking out. He didn't want to have to look Gamzee in the eye, and see the pain that lingered there; the pain that he hadn't been able to prevent even though he was merely feet away.

"You know it's not your fault." Terezi told him, once they were out of earshot of the two children.

"Yeah, I guess. But it's hard not to blame myself, when I watched my brother die, and nearly watched both our kids follow him down." He said, staring at the cold, white linoleum.

"It'll be okay, Karkles. I promise, it'll get better." If anyone knew guilt by proximity, it was she, and she knew that while it never really went away, it did lessen with time.

"If you say so." He mumbled, burying his head in her shoulder until he heard the water shut off, needing to exhibit his usual cold, uncaring demeanor, lest someone think that he could actually be broken. He was the patriarch now, and in a way always had been, and he had to ensure that nothing happened on his watch.

The doctor decided that, while he may have some co-dependence and self-esteem issues to deal with, Gamzee was more or less cured of an incurable illness, and would pose no threat to anyone if he were let outside into the real world. The courts quickly decided that Gamzee was not guilty, since he had no real choice but to kill Vriska, lest she slaughter everyone present. Surprisingly, Equius started hanging out with them when school started again, and seemed to have no bitter feelings for his sister's death.

Soon, Christmas passed, and New Years swiftly after. And with the coldest of the Northern chill came the hottest of holidays, Valentines!

**So short chapter is short. Sorry to keep you waiting and then give you this, but I've been sick as a dog, and it just wasn't working out. Next chapter is Valentines and smut, and then this will FINALLY BE OVER! Thanks to everyone who has read along so far!**


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